If I had the energy or motivation, I would text Katie what I really thought about her telling Ethan where I was.
I was twenty-eight years old. I didn’t need my big brother to look out for me.
It wasn’t like he had been doing such a good job of it when we were growing up, anyway.
“I figured you would be sad today, and I didn’t want to leave you alone,” Ethan said softly, and I looked away from him so he wouldn’t see the moisture in my eyes.
I had been doing so well. I hadn’t cried all day, even when I really wanted to, and now Ethan was going to ruin all that effort.
He gently grasped my arm with his giant hands and helped me up. I looked down at where we touched and took in the difference between us. Where I had fair skin, he was slightly darker than me, taking after our dad’s Mediterranean roots. Where my skin was free from any scars, imperfection or tattoos, Ethan was showing two full sleeves of tattoo through his black t-shirt, covering most of the scars he had received during his wild youth. The only thing we shared was our hair color.
My brother was also, quite easily, the biggest man I knew.
It was no wonder my blond stranger ran away at the sight of him.
We passed my stranger and his friend on the way out, and Ethan glared at them. They both looked down to their drinks, pretending not to see us.
“Why are you acting so protective?” I asked once we were outside. Ethan led me to his car. “If I wanted to bring a man home with me tonight, I could do that without asking for your permission.”
He let out a low groan next to me, the noise almost drowned out by Boston’s busy traffic.
“Let’s not talk about you taking any man home, especially a strange man, okay?”
I scoffed and looked away. My eyes found a black Mercedes parked just across the street from the bar. Boston was apparently littered with black Mercedes, because that was the third one I had seen this week.
Ethan held the passenger door open for me, and I climbed into his black Jeep with a loud sigh.
I was going to make sure he knew just how annoyed I was at him by the time he got me home.
I crossed my arms over my chest and looked out the window when he climbed into the car and started it, turning on the heat. It was January in Boston, after all. And there was only one kind of weather for January in Boston…
Cold and wet.
“Are you mad at me?” Ethan asked quietly.
I didn’t answer him. I continued to look out the window at the setting sun, at the busy people walking in the streets despite the cold, and at all the lights coming to life at this hour.
I was sad.
I guess the best thing for me to do was admit it, considering I spent so long denying that there was something wrong with me—even to myself.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. Can’t you see I’m just trying to look out for you?” Ethan asked softly. I could see him holding out his hand to me from the corner of my eye, and I held my breath, hoping he wouldn’t touch me. I would surely break down if he did, and I didn’t want to break down in front of anyone, least of all Ethan.
Thankfully, he didn’t touch me. His hand hovered awkwardly in the space between us for a moment or two before he put it back down on his lap.
We didn’t say anything for a long moment, but Ethan didn’t put the car in gear either. We just sat there, two lost souls not knowing what to say to each other.
I was kind of thankful for that. I didn’t want to go home to an empty apartment, or worse, to Katie’s well-meaning but unneeded worried expression.
Ethan didn’t know every detail about what happened six years ago. He knew just enough to know why I was like this, but Katie knew everything. She knew why I couldn’t get over it, and though it felt nice to have someone with me during the hardest time of my life, someone I could talk to about it—I just didn’t want it right now.
I just wanted to disappear for a little while…
Suddenly the enclosed space of the car was too much to bear. I couldn’t do it, not this day, and not with Ethan.
I pulled the door handle and climbed out of the car. Peeking in to see the concerned look on my brother’s face, I shook my head. “Go home. I don’t need you to look after me. I can do that all on my own. And I’m fine, okay? I promise. I just need to forget about today, and I can’t do that with you hovering over me.”
“Evelyn, please—”