I swallow. “But you don’t want to destroy me?”
“But I don’t want to destroy you,” he verifies.
“Oh. Okay.”
“It’s just a game,” he says, like that will reassure me.
I guess it does.
I don’t think I liked what just happened, but if he did, I guess… I guess I’m open to it.
I like what’s happening now, at least. I love when he’s tender with me, when he pets me and relaxes me. I love when he leans in and kisses me like I’m something precious to him, even if he just fucked me like I’m definitely not.
Chapter thirty-four
Aubrey
It’s light outside when my eyes open again.
I am lying in Chase Darington‘s bed with his arm draped over my waist. I can feel his hard, muscular length pressed against my side, see his handsome face looking peaceful as he sleeps. I am exactly where I want to be.
Memories of last night wash over me. They’re violent and brutal and a little confusing, but in the light of day, it doesn’t bother me so much. So he likes rougher sex than I do. He’s more experienced than I am. Maybe I’ll grow to like it, too.
Besides, it’s not just bad memories. Before the confusing sex, we had the most romantic night. He bought me flowers and this beautiful necklace. We drank champagne, and he gave me my first swimming lesson because he wants to make sure I stay safe.
And that was after he went to such extreme lengths to make sure I could safely get my mom to a doctor’s appointment on the other side of the country—an appointment that he paid for, and a treatment that might save her life.
Looking at the overall picture helps me with my perspective.
I think the sex only threw me so much because I was unprepared for it. If I knew what he wanted going into it, it wouldn’t have been so jarring and… scary.
I shake that thought off, turning in his arms so that my back is facing him. I’m thirsty, so I grab the bottle of water off the nightstand and take a drink.
“Pass that over here, would you?”
His voice rough with sleep makes me smile. I ease back in the bed, pulling his sheet around my breasts, and pass him the water.
He takes a few greedy sips, then hands it back to me. “Thanks, baby.”
I put the water back, then snuggle up in the blankets. He grabs me around the waist, pulling me back until I’m spooned against his hard body.
“You sleep okay?” he murmurs.
“Yeah. Your bed is incredibly comfortable.”
He smirks. “And the company wasn’t so bad, either?”
“Oh, right, you,” I tease. “Yeah, I like you, too.”
He squeezes me and starts tickling me as an act of revenge. I laugh and squeal and cry for mercy, but end up curled right back up against him.
His arms tighten around my waist. “Do you have anything planned today?”
“I have to work tonight.”
“Do you have to? You can’t get out of it?”
I crack a smile, hugging his arms around me. “No, I can’t get out of it. I need the money.”
“I’ll pay you not to go,” he says. “I’ll pay you double what you’d make working.”
That is tempting. “I… I don’t want to screw them over, though.”
“They’ve never screwed you over?”
I think about Stacey writing me up for the Anae thing. “Yeah, I guess they have.”
“So, call off. I’m sure you never do it. Live a little. I want to take you somewhere. Spend a little more time with you before we have school for another week.”
“Where do you want to take me?”
He leans in and kisses his way along my jaw. “Just somewhere I always liked to go with my parents when I was a kid.”
I expected him to say something totally different, but that feels like he wants to open up to me and show me a little piece of him I haven’t seen yet. I don’t know if I can pass that up. “I’ll call and see if anyone can cover my shift. I’ll have to go home first and get ready, anyway.”
He moves my hair and kisses my neck. “All right.”
Since his body is fitted right up against mine, I can feel him getting hard as he holds me close and kisses me.
Reluctance tugs at me as his hand finds my breast and he squeezes. My body isn’t ready to go another round, and after the last one, I’m not positive my mind is, either, but when he grabs a condom and sits up in bed, I let him pull me on top of him.
I shift on his lap, instinctively trying to move away from the part of him that hurt me last night. He grabs my hips, taking control and guiding himself between my thighs.
I grab his shoulders, my teeth sinking into my bottom lip as I ease down on his cock. I go slowly, but it stings so bad.