“Ye kenned what I’d assume,” he muttered, embarrassed. “Unless… did ye hope to make me jealous? Is that why ye did it?” He couldn’t deny that it had worked.
Pinching the bridge of his nose, he prayed for a distraction from his muddled thoughts of her. It seemed as if the road would stretch on for eternity. All he wanted was to be back at his home, squirreled away in his study where he could properly ignore her and be at no risk of falling in love.
She’ll grow tired of tryin’ to be in my company, will she nae?Chewing his lower lip, panic struck him. What if she wouldn’t allow him to ignore her?
In the two days since he met her, he’d come to three conclusions: First, she was one of the most annoying creatures he had ever known, defiant and unruly in a way that caused his blood to yearn for her and the wild spirit she possessed. Second, she wasn’t boring. The memory of her on the dance floor, smiling and spinning around as her dress licked her ankles made him smile. Third, she was so beautiful that being near to her, but not trusting himself to touch her, threatened to push him to the brink of madness.
I cannae make the mistake I made last night again.His fingertips still remembered how her skin had felt. Like the rarest silk. But his body had acted against the will of his mind, revealing a crack in his armor. There was no denying the fact that he wanted her. He wanted more than just to possess her. He wanted her heart and her soul, but how could he take something that he wasn’t willing to give in return?
Dropping his head, he realized he had but two choices, two paths for his marriage to her—he could either let down his guard and let her in, or push her as far away from him as he could.
If what her faither said is true, and she is loyal, then perhaps Icouldopen myself to her. Let her see all the things I am.The very notion chilled him. He pulled in quick, shallow breaths as the anxiety and panic started to seep into his bones. Swallowing the lump of fear, he looked to the trees and focused on the birds in the branches. For the sake of his sanity and to protect himself, hehadto push her away.
“I should have let ye stay,” he whispered, as his gaze was pulled right back to his wife’s sleeping form. Once again, it appeared his body wouldn’t obey his mind.
Before he knew it, Noah had drifted into a fantasy, envisioning himself in the carriage with her. The heat of her would certainly cause it to be more appealing than the lonely chill that the outside offered.
A smile played upon his lips as he thought of slipping his hand over her covered knee. She would look at him with her daring gaze, as if telling him that was as far as he could go and no more. But, he wouldn’t listen to her silent plea. Testing her real desire, he knew he would slowly push her dress up, revealing more of that smooth flesh until her hand grabbed his to tell him to stop. In his fantasy, she wouldn’t.
Noah’s heart quickened as his throat went dry. It wasn’t that he hadn’t been with a woman before, only that it was now his wife he was dreaming of seducing.
Licking his lips, he exhaled, trying to force away the need to have her. Yet, the fantasy wouldn’t let him go. Chewing on his lip, he thought of how he would run kisses along the dip where her legs were clamped tight together, not by a lack of desire but from the nerves of innocence. He would kiss that tempting path until her thighs relaxed and the heat of her desire couldn’t be denied. Only then, at the peak of her thighs, would he draw his kiss to somewhere sweeter.
Would she moan my name? Would she throw her head back in bliss and claw at the coverlets? Would she rake her nails down my back?He smiled.Or would she scold me for ticklin’ her?
He imagined her urging him up from that secret place, so she could wrap her arms around him and pull him flush against her. His gaze darted through the carriage curtains to the bodice that crushed her pert, round breasts together. His lips, his caress, would seek to taste that forbidden fruit, sliding his tongue between them and taking her pink nipples into his mouth.
Too ablaze to cease his emboldened thoughts, his eyes drifted to Saoirse’s neck. Was that where she sprayed the maddening perfume that caused him to lose all reason? As he pulled in a deep breath, the phantom scent filled his senses. He closed his eyes to relish in it, deciding to let his mind wander some more.
Are ye dreamin’ about me, too?He cracked one eye open to observe her, hoping he might see some sign of her dreams on her sleeping face. Her mouth moved as if she were speaking, but no words came out. It was as if he was spying on a secret part of her world, but did not know the language of it. He supposed it was the same with the secrets of love. Lasting love, anyway.
“Careful M’Laird. Ye’ve a mighty fall if ye drift off to sleep and tumble from that saddle.” Both of Noah’s eyes snapped open at the sound of Saoirse’s amused voice. “What need do ye have of such a giant horse, anyway? Are ye nae big enough on yer own?”
He cursed himself inwardly for staring at her so long. “I wouldnae fall from my saddle,” he mumbled, trying to clear his head. “I’ve ridden this road so often Icouldfall asleep and still make it to my castle.”
“And ye’d have me to keep ye upright,” Scott suddenly interrupted, riding around the rear of the carriage to intrude on the private moment. “Daenae fret, M’Lady, I’ve kept yer husband from causin’ himself injury more times than I’ve had hot dinners.”
Saoirse righted herself and shuffled to the window, leaning out with a smile on her face. “Have we met?”
Her silky tone irritated Noah, driving a spear of jealousy through his chest. “This is Scott Pittsborough. My Man-at-Arms and a friend to me.”
“A Scot by the name of Scott.” Saoirse chuckled. “How perfect. Now, what else can ye tell me of my husband? He has told me nothin’ so I suppose I must find other sources. Reliable ones.”
Noah squirmed in the saddle. “I thought ye craved yer rest?”
“I cannae sleep well when the carriage is tossin’ and turnin’ like we’re at sea,” Saoirse replied, resting her chin on her hand as her gaze lingered on Scott. “Perhaps, a few tales might encourage me to sleep again.”
Scott laughed. “I’ve got plenty of those, M’Lady.”
Noah glared at his friend as if he had just discovered the man was a traitor, but it only served to bolster Scott’s amusement. “Would ye leave the right flank exposed to miscreants and thieves? Return to yer position at once.”
“It seems M’Laird doesnae want me spillin’ his stories to ye, M’Lady.” Scott flashed Noah a wink. “Another time, perhaps, when there are nay distractions. We could go around in a circle, each person tellin’ somethin’ about themselves.”
Saoirse beamed. “I rather like the sound of that.”
The trouble was, the stories that Scott and Noah knew about one another were definitely not suitable for a young lady’s ears. Especially not the ears of Noah’s wife. If she didn’t already think he was a despicable rogue without a heart, she would if she heard a single tale from his recent, unruly past.
It is done now. I’m nae that lost soul anymore, tryin’ to fix a broken heart in any way possible,he wanted to explain, but he feared it might be an admission of guilt.