I burst into tears and dropped my head into my hands. I couldn’t sit there and lie to her face. I’d planned to tell my parents and Brody together that night so I’d only have to say it once, but I needed mymom.
“Savannah, what’s wrong?” She came over to where I was sitting and pulled me up and into ahug.
“Oh Mom,” I said between sobs. “I’ve been sostupid.”
“You’re scaring me.” She took a step back from me so she could see my face, her hands holding mine. “What have you done?” she asked, her voice pleading with me to tellher.
I looked down at the floor, unable to look her in the eye. “I’m pregnant,” I whispered, tears rolling down my face. I waited for her to go crazy and shout, but there was nothing but silence. I slowly raised my head to look at her, seeing silent tears falling down her face. “I’m so sorry,” I said. She dropped my hands and sat down heavily in the chair. “Please say something,” I begged, the silence seeming far worse than her screaming atme.
“Who’s the father?” she asked quietly, looking up at me for the first time since I told her. I slowly shook my head and she gasped. “You don’t know?” she exclaimed in disbelief. I shook my head again, not knowing what to say. “Oh Savannah.” The disappointment in her voice broke me and I started crying again. I saw something in her change and she quickly stood up, pulling me into her arms. “Shhh, it’s okay sweetheart, it’ll beokay.”
“I’m so scared Mom,” I mumbled through mysobs.
“I’m here for you Savannah. I can’t pretend I’m happy about this—it’s not something I wanted for you at 21—but I love you and we’ll get throughthis.”
Relief flooded my body, making me cry even harder. I knew I still had my dad and Brody to tell, but knowing I had the support of my mom made telling them seem a little bit easier. “I love you too,” I chokedout.
“Have you seen adoctor?”
I nodded, pulling myself together. “I went today with Libby. I’m seventeen weeks and threedays.”
“Seventeen weeks! How long have youknown?”
“About a month,” I told her quietly, seeing the hurt in her eyes. “I didn’t realize I was so far along until the sonogram today. I was still having my period untilrecently.”
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier? I would have come withyou.”
“It’s taken me a while to get my head around it. I’ve been dreading tellingeveryone.”
“What happened Sav? I’ve seen a change in you recently. You’ve been going out a lot more, and not coming home some nights. It’s so unlikeyou.”
I flopped down in my chair, knowing I had to tell her about my feelings for Josh. Fiddling with the tissue I’d grabbed to wipe my eyes, I took a deep breath. “I’m in love with Josh,” I said quietly. I looked up as I heard herlaugh.
“Sweetheart, that’s not news to me. You’ve been in love with him foryears.”
My eyes widened in surprise. “You know?” I asked, my voice not hiding myshock.
I watched as she nodded her head. “I’ve seen the way you look at him, it’s clear for anyone to see. I also see how he looks at you,” she said, raising hereyebrows.
“He doesn’t look at me any way, Mom. He’s not interested—he’s made that pretty clear on more than one occasion, and even if he was interested”—I put my hand on my stomach—“he won’t be now.” Standing up, I walked over to the fridge, reaching inside for a bottle of water. “I couldn’t stand to watch him with other girls so I stopped going out with Lib, Mason, and Brody in case he showed up. I started hanging around with some girls from school.” I paused, taking a swig of water. “I just wanted to forgethim.”
“I wish you’d talked to mehoney.”
“Me too Mom…” I trailed off. “Do you think Brody knows how I feel aboutJosh?”
She smiled. “I don’t think so—men don’t seem to notice thesethings.”
“Dad’s going to be mad, isn’t he?” I asked, nervous for herreply.
“He’s not going to be happy. You might be 21, but you’re still his little girl. He’ll come around though—he loves you. When are you going to tellhim?”
“Tonight. No moresecrets.”
“Was everything okay at the doctor? I’m glad Libby was withyou.”
“Everything was fine. We heard the heartbeat and I got some pictures, would you like to see?” I asked cautiously. I knew she’d said she would support me, but I was still apprehensive to see herreaction.
“Yes, I’d love to.” She gave me an encouraging smile and I ran upstairs, digging in my purse for the pictures. Coming back into the kitchen, I laid them on the table for her to see. I watched her as she reached her hand up to cover her mouth. “My baby’s having a baby,” she muttered behind her hand, looking down inawe.