We drove for a few minutes in uncomfortable silence and when I couldn’t take it anymore, I lifted my hand, gesturing to his now blood-stained shirt. “I’m sorry about your shirt,” I said quietly in an attempt to break the ice. “I’ll replace it,” Ipromised.
“It’s fine, I’ve got lots. Don’t worry aboutit.”
Silence filled the truck again, but fortunately the journey to the hospital was a short one. Before I knew it, Josh was parking the truck. He jumped out and ran around to open the door for me. “You look pale, let me help you,” he said, reaching into the truck and taking my uninjured hand. I wasn’t going to argue—I felt like shit and my head waspounding.
I let him guide me into the emergency room and up to the reception desk. I gave my information, explaining what had happened to my hand as well as telling them I was pregnant. Josh was still holding my hand and I felt him squeeze it slightly when I mentioned the pregnancy. The receptionist called an orderly, who took us through to a cubicle. “Someone should be with you in about 20 minutes,” she told me with a smile. “If there’s anything you need in the meantime, press your buzzer and someone will be right withyou.”
“Thank you.” I replied as she left. I sat down heavily on the bed, my hand throbbing. “You don’t have to stay Josh, I can call my mom, or Brody. I’m sure you’ve got better things to be doing than sitting here with me. We could be here for a while.” I didn’t want him to think that because he’d brought me to the hospital, he’d have to stay with me—for all I knew, he had plans withBeth.
He sat down in the chair across from the bed. “I’m not leaving, so stop trying to get rid of me. I was coming to the cottage anyway to finish painting,remember?”
“I wasn’t sure if you’d still come after last night,” I said, looking over tohim.
He sighed loudly. “I really am sorry about last night.” He dragged his hand through his hair, his eyes dropping to the ground. “All I seem to be doing at the moment is upsetting you.” I shrugged my shoulders. I wasn’t about to make him feel better by telling him I wasn’t upset. After a few minutes of silence, he asked, “How’s the handfeeling?”
“Sore,” I told him, looking down at my bandaged hand. Biting down on my lip, I raised my eyes to his. “Why are you helping me with the cottage?” I asked quietly. “It’s not that I’m not grateful, because clearly I need the help.” I raised my bloodied hand and gave him a small smile. “But we haven’t exactly had a great relationship the past fewmonths.”
He stood up and crossed the room, kneeling in front of me. “I know I’ve hurt you in the past…even as recently as yesterday. When you told me how you felt about me, I had no idea how to deal with it. I acted like an idiot. You’re my best friend’s little sister, and you’ve been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I hate that things have become so tense between us. I care about you Sav, and I need to know that you’re okay. That’s why I want to helpyou.”
It wasn’t the declaration of love I had been so desperate to hear from him, but I was slowly coming around to the idea that I was never going to get that. I had myself and my baby to think about now, and I’d have to accept that we would never be together. If he was offering friendship, I’d take it. “Okay, if you’re sure,” I told himquietly.
“I’m sure.” He stood up and moved back to the chair across theroom.
Just then the curtain pulled back and a nurse came in. “Hi Savannah, I’m Shelby. I just need to take some observations and ask you a few questions, and then the doctor will be in shortly.” I nodded as she set up the blood pressure machine. “How many weeks pregnant are you?” she asked as she placed the cuff on myarm.
“Eighteen weeks and five days,” I told her, glancing over at Josh, who was watching meintently.
“Have you been feeling okay?” she asked, watching the numbers on themachine.
“Nauseous, but fine other than that,” I replied. The machine started beeping and I looked over, not having a clue what the sound meant. “Is everythingokay?”
“Your blood pressure is pretty low, have you been feelingdizzy?”
“She almost passed out earlier, but I thought it was because she hurt her hand,” I heard Josh say before I could answer. He got up and stood by myside.
“Have you eaten today?” the nurse askedkindly.
“No, I was feeling too sick thismorning.”
“Well that won’t help your blood pressure. I’m going to contact obstetrics and ask for someone to come down and see you after we’ve looked at your hand.” I nodded, glancing up at Josh. “Try not to worry,” Shelby said. “I’m sure everything will be fine.” She took a few more notes and drew some blood before leaving theroom.
“Sav, do you want me to call your mom?” Josh asked from myside.
I shook my head. “No, she’ll only worry, I’ll call her once we know more.” I paused, my eyes filling with tears. “I know this baby wasn’t planned, but if anythinghappens…”
“Hey.” He kneeled in front of me again and took my hand. “Nothing is going to happen. You and your baby are both going to befine.”
“I hope so,” Iwhispered.
20 minutes later, my hand had been stitched and bandaged and I was nervously pacing the tiny cubicle, waiting for the obstetrician. “Savannah, sit down,” Josh said, standing from his chair and guiding me backward until my legs hit the bed, pushing gently on my shoulders. “Worrying won’t do the baby anygood.”
“You should listen to him, he’s right,” said a voice from behind the curtain. As it was pulled back, I saw an older lady standing there, holding a cart with a machine on it. “I’m Dr. Whitehouse, let’s take a look at baby and check that everything is okay.” She wheeled in what I assumed was a portable ultrasound machine and began setting it up. “If you could lie back on the bed and undo yourshorts.”
“Maybe I should wait outside,” I heard Joshsay.
“No! Please stay,” I exclaimed, practically begging him. I didn’t want to be on myown.
“Yes, come on over Dad. You won’t want to miss seeing your little one the screen,” Dr. Whitehouse said, turning and smiling atJosh.