“TornToPieces”—PopEvil
“We need to get on the road,” Raptor urged. “It’s going to be a long, cold ride, and we need to get home while the weather is decent.”
Sloane’s mother pressed something into Voodoo’s hand and held her palm to his cheek. “Safe travels,” she murmured, then turned to me.
“Keagan,” she said, my given name sounding odd since I rarely ever heard it anymore. It reminded me of how Voodoo’s grandmother, Madame, refused to call anyone by their road names. “I cannot thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me and my daughter. And though I understand why you have to leave, I will patiently wait for the day you return. There is no other for my daughter but you. You know that, right?”
Fuck, even her mom was laying on the guilt.
“Mom,” Sloane interrupted. When her mother’s gaze fell on hers, she shook her head almost imperceptibly as her chest heaved, and she inhaled a deep, shaky breath. Though I tried not to be, I was angry that she refused to even consider coming back with me. Annette pressed something in my hand. Glancing down, I studied the smooth blue-lavender stone. It was incredibly similar to the color of Sloane and Voodoo’s eyes.
“It’s blue lace agate. It emits a calming and soothing vibration—to cool off your strong andfieryemotions,” she explained. My gaze lifted from the stone to hers. More lavender than her daughter’s but still penetrating and seeming to stare into my very soul. A soft Madonna-like curve lifted her lips.
Voodoo stepped up and hugged Sloane. “Whenever you wanna come for a visit, you just let me know. Kira, Rose, my mom, and Hawk already can’t wait to meet you.”
“I still can’t believe they would want that,” she said with a sad smile. Seeing her like this left me aching to make her happy. Biting my lip, I turned around and rubbed my beard as I tried to control the emotions clogging my throat—emotions I never expected.
“You’re family now,” I heard him tell her as I squeezed my eyes shut.
“Phoenix,” Sloane murmured behind me, and her hand brushed mine. I jumped, having not heard her approach.
Steeling myself, I turned to face her.
“I—” she began, but I shook my head.
Unable to speak, I wove my fingers with hers and pulled her around the corner of the building. As soon as we cleared the line of sight from my brothers, I pushed her against the metal siding, drove my fingers into her hair, and used it to tilt her head before my lips crashed to hers. With each stroke of my tongue with hers, I tried to convey the desperate words I couldn’t say.
Her hands curled around my forearms, and she hung on for dear life as our kiss became increasingly wicked and carnal. No matter how long it lasted, it would never be long enough. I never wanted it to end.
Finally, we broke apart, nipping each other in our reluctance to let each other go. It left me breathless and lightheaded. Her pupils were huge in her pale blue eyes, her lips red and swollen as they parted.
“Stay,” she begged, her voice soft and breathy. Eyes glassy and bright with unshed tears, she searched my gaze for a break in my resolution.
“Baby, we’ve been over this… you know I can’t. My family, my club, my job—they’re all back in Iowa. Come with me,” I tried again. It was probably the hundredth time that I asked her. I wasn’t sure why I expected that time to result in a different answer.
“Phoenix….” She drew out my name, heavy with regret. Yeah, I knew she needed me to quit asking. I knew it, but I couldn’t help it. Leaving her behind felt like someone had carved out my heart. I’d likely bleed out on the ride home.
I clutched her hair and the back of her neck and pressed my forehead to hers, closing my eyes. With difficulty, I swallowed the lump in my fucking throat.
Neither of us was willing to bend, and because of that, there was no future for us.
The rumble of a motorcycle starting was my cue. Our time was up.
Shittiest day ever.
Unable to look into her eyes because of the pain I knew would be there, I brushed my lips across her forehead and turned away.
Though I didn’t look back, I knew I left her crying. I felt each tear that dropped like it was acid on my soul.
Me: I miss you like crazy. I wish you were here. It’s tearing me to pieces being away from you. I swear I see your face everywhere. You fill my dreams every fucking night. I know it sounds crazy, but I love you.
I stared at the words I’d typed. Lip between my teeth, I debated. Then like I did each time, I backspaced through it all. It was stupid. She’d made it pretty clear she was trying to move on. She rarely answered my texts, and my calls usually went to voicemail. At least they did until I filled her mailbox with rambling messages where I never did say the things I wanted to.
“Church in five,” Voodoo announced.
Startled, I looked up from my phone and was sure he could see my misery surrounding me like a goddamn cloak. One that was weighted and pulling me under. As I stood there mute, he handed Parker off to Kira. The sympathetic expression on her face told me that Voodoo had run his fucking mouth.
Parker pulled his fingers out of his mouth, slobber strings breaking when he cooed and threw himself toward me. “Parker!” Kira admonished, though he didn’t give two shits. I caught him before he dove out of his mother’s arms to the floor.