Sam openedthe door to the dark, quiet school, and the five of them went into the building. It was cooler than Natalie expected, but it smelled just like she remembered. Memories floated through her mind as he led them to the gym. Walking down the hallway past a bank of lockers, she almost reached out to touch one. Hanna’s. It was right there, by Henry’s and Hazel’s. She was surprised they were still there. Her own one was nine lockers before; she was a B, they were Ms.
She knew she was falling behind the others, but she didn’t care. This wasn’t the first time she had been in the building since the Friday before the accident, but it was the first time she had been down this hallway when the building was nearly empty. Silent, like it was mourning too.
All those years ago, someone else cleaned out her locker. Someone else took down the pictures she had taped in there. Somebody else has used that locker—six other people now.
She forced herself to walk away from the memories. She couldn’t go back to that day. She couldn’t bring them back. They were just lockers now, someone else’s lockers.
Stepping into the gym, she watched as Sam and the three girls set up the volleyball net. It was the same net she had put up dozens of times. She could help, but instead, she just looked around the brightly lit gym with all its memories.
Many hours of her youth had been spent in here. From being so little and playing during recess when it was too cold to go outside. It was this gym because the school was small enough to have been the school she’d attended from kindergarten to graduation, except she hadn’t graduated here. The accident was too many months before graduation to get her diploma. Instead, she got her GED a year later.
It was also the gym she played every home game of volleyball and basketball, practiced nearly every day. All with Hanna and Hazel, who she had forced to stay in the sports that only Natalie herself was good at and loved. But they stayed because she’d asked.
Closing her eyes, she could see the bleachers full, and the announcer saying her name in a rolling cadence that echoed off the walls as she ran out onto the court every game. Opening them again, she saw the empty gym in front of her again, quiet.
Looking back at the girls who were done putting up the net, she turned to Sam. She had no idea if she could even play this anymore. Her body was different from the last time she had been here.
Sam walked up to her carrying a ball and handed it to her. As if he knew what she was thinking, he said, “Just try.”
Smiling at him, she took the ball and walked further into the large room. Bouncing the ball like a basketball, she walked to the girls standing in a cluster by the net. “I haven’t played in a while. I hope I don’t embarrass myself.”
They laughed with her, and one said, “I haven’t touched a volleyball since November. I’ll probably embarrass myself too.”
“I wish I could say November. Try six years. So, take it easy on me.”
They split into two groups, and as she took her position, she watched Sam leaving the gym. Letting her succeed or fail without him. Turning her back on him, she smiled at her partner Kylie. Bouncing the ball a few times then throwing it into the air, she served it, and it hit the net soundly. Then bounced to the ground. Kylie tossed it back to her, and she tried again. This time it went over the net like it was supposed to. As one of the other girls set the ball back, she forgot about her body’s possible limitations and threw herself into the game.
By the end, she was exhausted, but it was a good feeling. She and Kylie had lost their game, but it didn’t seem to bother the younger girl, so Natalie let it go as the four went to the stage at the end of the gym to sit down. The three younger women jumped up and sat on the edge, and Olivia asked, “Were you really going to play volleyball at NDSU?”
Surprised at the question, Natalie had almost forgotten the scholarship she had received a few days before the accident. Hence the drinking to celebrate. Nodding, she said, “Yes, and for basketball. I was going to try out for softball when I got there, but I never got there.”
“I know.” Kylie nodded. “Every year, we get the talk about drinking and driving. They always include pictures of your car.”
Natalie’s heart almost stopped. Her car. Her beautiful little red Ford Focus bought used and well-loved. The only thing she had added was a new stereo. Another victim of the accident. She was sure she never needed to see those pictures.
“It was worse than the car probably looks. So do not drink and drive, and always wear your seat belts.Always.” Natalie looked at each of the girls, hoping beyond hope that they would never go through anything like she did.
“You look like you aren’t any worse for wear,” Ava stated. She was looking Natalie up and down.
“You remind me of me, Ava. Indestructible. But you’re not. Neither am I,” she said to all three. Then changed the subject. “Are you guys looking forward to senior year? You’re all seniors, right?”
“Yup, this is the year,” Olivia said with a smile.
“You guys were really good out there. Do you think you’ll get very far?” Natalie asked. Landstad never went to state in sports; they were never that good. But sometimes, they came close.
“Nope, we have no coach, so we’re not doing volleyball this year,” Kylie answered from her spot on the stage.
“Coach Miller?” He had been the coach for as long as she could remember. Though she hadn’t liked him much, she had respected him.
“Retired,” Ava supplied. “And nobody else wants to coach us.”
Realization dawned on her. Sam and his dirty tricks. He wanted her to coach, and they were short a volleyball coach, knowing that she would have a harder time saying no when she knew some of the girls. But she had no idea how to coach. Sure, she could play the game, but that was not the same thing as coaching it.
“Mr. Sullivan said you would maybe be able to coach us,” Olivia stated.
“I’ve never coached before,” she admitted to the three girls.
“Mr. Sullivan said you would figure it out. We’ve only two weeks before we have to start practicing for the season. Could you think about it?” Kylie asked.