“I haven’t done anything yet.”
Sol shakes his head with a smile and walks away. I watch him until he’s out of sight, and even then, I don’t turn back to my computer. He didn’t mention the meet, but then neither did I. There’s not much to talk about, though. My pulse races at the thought of having an excuse to spending time with him, but I instantly berate myself. This can’t go anywhere. I need to get this stupid juvenile crush under control.
Turning back to my desk, I tap my phone to wake it. Alex hasn’t got back to me. I’ll speak to him in person at the party tonight. He’ll definitely be there as President. Shaking my head, I screenshot and download the evidence, trying to push thoughts of Sol from my mind.
SOL
“Do you think he’s going to be okay?” Zak asks.
I frown at Alex, who’s lying face down on his bed, where he’s been for the last two hours. “No.”
Since the truth got out about Sasha’s diary, he’s been a mess. I’ve never seen him like this before and Zak and I realized pretty damn quickly that he’s in no state to help with the party prep. Honestly, he hasn’t had anything to do with it during the last week or so. It’s fine. I’ve enjoyed getting stuff ready, and it’s a really low-key party. Not like the opening event where we hired caterers and decorators. This is just a good ol’ fashioned, come get drunk before you go home to be thankful with your fucked up families. Well, that’s what Zak says. My family are as close to perfect as I could wish for.
Closing his door, we head back downstairs where the rest of our brothers are moving furniture to make room for people and setting drinks and food out on the bar in the kitchen. Everyone’s pulled together like clockwork, and our newest recruits especially, have put in extra time to get things ready. Excitement sizzles in my blood, my heart beating a little faster than usual—as though I’ve had too much caffeine.
“You okay?” Zak asks, raising a dark eyebrow in my direction.
I nod, stooping to unpack a crate of beer so I don’t have to look at him. I’m so far from ‘okay’, the very idea is laughable. Tonight, I’m going to try to kiss a guy.No. Not a guy. Wes. My stomach flips and I suck in a breath. I have literally never been so nervous about kissing someone in my life. Not even when I was thirteen, playing spin the bottle with Jessica Greeves, who I thought I was head over heels in love with at the time.
“Here.”
I straighten at the sound of liquid being poured and a glass being shoved across the counter. Peering at the amber liquid, I glance at my friend. “What is it?”
“Something to calm you the hell down,” Zak says, pushing the drink nearer.
Lifting the glass, I sniff, realizing it’s bourbon. I spy the bottle behind Zak and my eyebrows shoot up. It’s Alex’s good stuff.
“Seriously?”
He folds his arms. “Are you going to tell me you don’t want it?”
I down it in one and slam the glass down on the counter as the liquor burns down my throat.
Zak takes the glass and pours another measure. “Are you going to tell me what’s got you so worked up?”
“Is that why you’re trying to get me drunk?”
“No. I’m hoping you’ll tell me on your own.”
I glance around, aware of the other Wolves milling about preparing for the party and nod my head in the direction of the back door. Zak’s expression turns serious as he leads the way out, holding the door open for me.
It’s cold outside, and I’m glad of my drink as each sip warms me from the inside. I can feel Zak staring at me, but I can’t bring myself to start talking. I don’t even know where to begin.
“Is this about the whole bisexual thing?” he blurts.
My exhale is loud and long. “Yeah.”
“Talk to me, bro.” He squeezes my shoulder. “What’s going on? Is there anything I can do to help?”
My heart twists. I have the best friends. Even if one of them is wallowing upstairs, I know he’d put his shit aside to help me if I needed him to.
Leaning back against the house, I grip my glass tight as I test out the words that have been striking fear into my heart since I went to see Wes at the swim meet. “I’m going to do what you said. I’m going to kiss a guy.”
Zak’s eyes widen. “Oh. Good for you. Any guy? Or do you have one in mind?”
My heart tries to hammer its way out of my chest as I debate giving up the last little detail. I shouldn’t say, but Zak knows every damn thing about me. But then, he’s not telling me what’s going on between him and Jaime. I frown. Maybe the honesty in our friendship isn’t as two-way as I think it is.
“No,” I say. “I’m psyching myself up for it.”