It hurts, to realize I’m the one making him uncomfortable. I royally fucked this up, and there’s no way I can fix it.
“Thank you, Rhett,” I say softly. “For rescuing me. Again.”
He nods, stuffing his hands in his front pockets. “I know you probably don’t want to talk about it.”
Yeah. I so don’t.
“But I just want you to know that whatever’s—going wrong in your life right now, it can be fixed. I know it can.” The sincerity written all over his face is sweet.
It’s also pointless. What’s gone wrong in my life can’t be fixed. If he ever finds out what I intended to do to him and his family, he’ll hate me forever.
“That’s all I’m going to say,” he continues when I don’t respond. “So…good night, Jensen.”
He turns and walks out of the guest bedroom, and I let him go.
Heaving a big sigh, I throw my suitcase on the bed and open it, picking out some clothes to change into before I head to the bathroom. I find the shower fully stocked with soap and shampoo but no conditioner, yet I can’t complain. I hop into the giant shower and wash the bus station filth off of me, hoping the shame and sadness I feel slides down the drain too. The water is super-hot and the pressure is perfect, so I stand under that shower head for an extra ten minutes and savor it.
I’m out of the shower and slathering lotion all over my still damp skin when I realize this is the second shower I’ve taken tonight. This has felt like the longest day of my life, I swear. I need to go to sleep and start over tomorrow. Maybe Rhett and I can talk more then. Maybe I can confess more too, but never the whole truth.
I can’t risk it.
When I open the bathroom door and see no lights on at all except for the guest bedroom lamp, I realize Rhett’s gone to bed without saying good night to me.
That hurts too.
Everything he seems to do to me tonight hurts, even though I know he’s not trying to hurt me on purpose. More than anything, I crave his approval. I want him to like me. He came back for me, so that’s got to mean something, right?
I dump my stuff back in my suitcase and then crawl into bed, shutting off the lamp with a loud click in the otherwise silent house. I lay there for what feels like hours, staring up at the ceiling, thinking bad th
oughts, wondering if Rhett’s blissfully asleep without a care in the world.
I hope like crazy he’s tossing and turning just like me.
When I can’t stand it any longer, I slip out of bed and make my way toward the closed door at the end of the hall.
Slowly opening the door, I spy Rhett lying flat on his back in the middle of his giant bed. He must’ve heard me enter the room because he sits straight up, the sheet falling to his waist and I can see he’s shirtless, his hair disheveled.
My entire body goes on high alert at seeing his broad shoulders, his defined chest. I want to touch him, feel his skin on mine, his mouth and tongue…
“Can’t sleep?” His voice is scratchy. Sexy.
I stop at the foot of his bed, feeling exposed since I’m wearing an old, oversized T-shirt that barely covers my butt and nothing else. Not even a pair of panties.
Honestly? I ‘forgot’ to wear panties on purpose. I knew I was going to do this.
With Rhett, when it comes to us, I have no shame.
“Yeah,” I finally say.
“Want to join me?” He flips the covers back and I don’t even bother answering. I just climb into his bed and snuggle up to him with my head resting on his chest, sighing with happiness when he tugs the covers over us before wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me even closer.
We remain silent and I let my hand wander across his chest, fingers skimming down his stomach. He’s touching me too, one hand sliding up and down my back, the other hand toying with the hem of my shirt. His muscles quiver beneath my fingertips and feeling emboldened, I move further south.
To discover he’s completely naked.
“Rhett,” I whisper, trying to sound outraged, even though I’m not. Of course I’m not. This is exactly what I want. “You don’t have any clothes on.”
“Yeah, well you’re not wearing panties.” To prove his point, he reaches beneath my shirt, his fingers grazing my pubic hair.