“You’re hurting me,” Dove whimpers, struggling against my grasp. I’m tempted to shove up her nightgown and rip her panties off of her. To teach her a lesson. If I knew I could stop there, I would. But I know I wouldn’t be able to. Not even as she begs me to, so I do the last thing I want. I let her go. I release my hold on her hair and take a step back.
“I hate you!” Angry pants slip from her lips, and I can feel my own rage boiling over. I need to leave this room, get away from her.
“Hate me all you want, but that doesn’t change anything. You’re still mine, and you’re still going to be here even when the anger passes. So, hate me. It doesn’t change a damn thing.”
Leaving the room, I feel like I’m drowning in my own rage. When I reach the library, I close the door behind me and sit down in one of the chairs. I hold my head in my hands for a long time, trying to get my breathing and mind back on track.
Needing to think about something else, I walk over to the safe, punch in the code and pull out the computer and phone. Dealing with some shit from the outside world should help. I set everything up and then check my email and messages. There are numerous messages from Christian, and I feel all the better about my choice of kidnapping Dove with each one that I read.
Christian: Bring me the girl, and I’ll spare you.
Christian: I’ve sent my men to find and kill both you and the girl. You’re a good kid, Zane, but you don’t fuck with the mob.
Christian: Where the fuck is the girl?
Christian: You’re dead.
There are at least a dozen more texts just like these. Some mentioning torture and rape if I don’t give both of us up. I’m not afraid though. They’ll never find Dove here. Never suspect that I’ve hidden her. They don’t know who she is to me. Just like I don’t know who Dove is to Christian, but I’ll figure it out. Nothing remains a secret for long in the world we live in.
Some corrupt asshole will take the money I offer him for information. It’s happened before, and it will happen again. We just need to lay low for a while, and then I can reach out to some people and get the ball rolling.
I check the surveillance on Dove’s apartment. I’m not shocked to find the place completely ransacked. If she could see how her apartment looks right now, she’d be devastated, or maybe she would finally believe me that she is here for her own protection.
I’ve rescued her from the darkness, saved her the heartbreak. She should be thanking me instead of fighting me. Thinking about what she said angers me more, and I shut my thoughts down completely.
Locking up the computer and phone, I try to think of what to do next. I haven’t had breakfast or coffee yet, but I don’t think my stomach could handle either. I decide to workout. I need to get rid of this tension in my muscles. I need an outlet, and the punching bag is going to be my best chance of making it through the day.
19
It takes me a long time to get my breathing under control after he leaves the room. My scalp tingles where he pulled my hair, and my insides twist with pure rage. I’ve never been this angry. Consumed by hate. All I can do is think of escaping. I’m not a person to him. I’m an obsession, an object. Something he owns and that he won’t let anyone else touch.
God, I can’t believe he did that. All the people he took from me… Shawn. I can’t even imagine the sinister things he did to him, to them. Fear coils deep in my gut. He said I’ll never be free of him. Tears fall from my eyes and cascade down my cheeks.
He did this for his own sick pleasure. He’s not protecting me. He’s keeping me. Locking me up. I won’t be a victim. I won’t let him control me. I’m going to get out of this, no matter what I have to do. Swiping at the tears, I force myself to get dressed.
It takes me forever to put my clothes on and even longer to walk out of the room, but when I do, Zane is nowhere to be found. I feel this strange tug on my heart at not seeing him, but I push the feeling away. He doesn’t deserve anything from me, least of all, for me to care about him. He’s a monster, a killer, and a criminal. He may not hurt me, but he’s hurt others, and that’s the same thing.