The next time I fall pregnant, I want it to be with someone who loves me and not just wants me for sex. A man that I would never have to doubt his feelings for me. A man that would never question his feelings for me and no matter what, will never be afraid of showing it to anyone. This is sex, I tell myself. Mason will not want me when he finds out who I really am and who I have given myself to. I don’t belong to him or anyone. I belong to my family’s legacy. I am my father’s hidden ace card. I’m just a lie. Everyone thinks I am someone I’m not. This is the only thing I can have from Mason, sex with no love. He could never love me the way I wanted, and I have accepted that we were never meant to be.
Chapter Sixteen
Mason
We head to the Ferrari Park, and it is the most fun I have had since forever. Lucy is still distant like she doesn’t trust me with her feelings, and I get that, but there is an inner turmoil she is battling. There are times I feel like a hypocrite for comparing myself to the prick she slept with. There is nothing I want more than to find out who it is and make him disappear for touching her. She would probably go on hating me but I’m a cartel King, it’s what we do. When she told me that my cock is bigger and it is big, it stroked my ego. What man gets mad when a girl tells him he is well endowed when she takes him in her mouth?
Her eyes light up when she spots a Ferrari 488 Pista all in black with red seats.
“Do you like it? You keep looking at it.”
She walks around the beautiful sleek convertible. “I love it. It is a bad bitch car. “
“A what?” I ask.
She places her hands on the hips of her low-cut ripped jeans that mold like a second skin to her ass. “A bad bitch car. Only bad bitches drive a car like that. It is classy like a Birkin bag.”
“You and your brother have very different tastes.”
“That is easy. He is boring and I’m… not.”
Walking up behind her I slide my arm around her waist and I murmur in her hair, “You are so not boring. I think you are unique and have a lot of style, but we have to talk about those jeans,” I tease.
She giggles. “What now? You are always giving me crap about my clothes.”
“I’m jealous of them. I’m not against them. It is what I want to do to you when you wear them.”
The rest of our stay is just like I planned. We go sightseeing on the island and I buy her a silk kimono with matching silk pants. She picked a handmade gold bikini that looks amazing on her skin. I made her promise to only wear it for me, it is so tiny and thin.
The memory of her kneeling down in the shower with my cock in her mouth replays in my mind. Her sky-blue eyes glistening while she watched me fuck her mouth was the most intense and beautiful thing. The taste of her lips and the smell of her skin are all I can think about. I was crazy thinking I could give her up. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for her. Not even her father could stop me from being with her. Nothing will stop me from being with Lucy.
Chapter Seventeen
Lucy
Amonth has gone by and every weekend I have been hanging out with Mason. We go to eat, or we hang out at the house binge watching The Queen of the South. Khalani and Aiden have joined us along with the rest of the guys, like old times.
“Are you coming to hang out with Linda tonight?” Khalani asks after class is over and we head inside the house toward the kitchen.
Mason and the guys have to handle another drop. Three truckloads this time. His father gave him full control over the family business in Mexico, according to Aiden. Leo’s father also gave Leo control. They have a lot of things to handle if they want to pave a way for the future and not be focusing on killing and drugs. Khalani says they have a grand plan and I believe them. Look at how they handle the East Hillside Kings.
“Yeah, I’ll go. Are you heading out now?”
She grabs her keys from the kitchen counter. “Yeah, let’s go.”
I’m wearing a black crop top showing my stomach with black designer Converse X Off-White sneakers and black ripped jeans with one dangerous rip on my lower ass cheek. Khalani is wearing her signature Cortez sneakers with a chola wifebeater and khakis.
“Do I look okay?” I ask her.
I told her about my weekend trip with Mason and our hot shower. She was happy for me and told me to enjoy it and that she hopes that we can work things out. I told her we are friends and are just hanging out. He kisses me when we are alone but he hasn’t touched me and I sometimes feel deflated like he is giving me mixed signals. He is possessive one week and then friendly Mase the next. I haven’t met up or seen Alex since the last time on Saturday at his apartment. He is probably bored of me because I am not what he is used to, or he got tired of me. My pride will not have me reaching out and take his silence as a way of him not wanting anything else with me. Khalani did tell me he was the type to just sleep with a girl and move on. Alex was honest in a way; it is for the best now that Mason and I are on speaking terms again. Alex sleeps with girls more experienced than me on the regular and probably has found someone new.
“Will you be cool if Smiley shows up?”
“I don’t have a boyfriend or anything.”
She juts her hip out. “What about Mase?”
“We are just friends.”