“No. You tried to get me to stay out of it. But my stubborn ass wouldn’t budge.”
“You are stubborn,” I agree.
“And proud of it.”
We stare at each other a moment, his soft eyes reminding me why it was so easy to fall in love with him. He’d been my first great love, and losing him nearly killed me. Elijah had come along next, but it was truly Tarnley who eased my pain.
A single tear slips down my cheek as he starts working my tense muscles once more.
“Keep talking. What happened after you killed Lucy?”
“I ran away.”
“Why would you do that? You’re no runner.”
“No, I’m not. But this time, things were complicated.”
“What made them so?”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Why am I having this conversation with myself?”
“Because you need it. Please, continue.”
Pursing my lips, I nod. “I came back because my bond with a vampire required me to do so.”
He stops, again. “You bonded with a vampire? Your mate?”
“No. I bonded with him to save him. His mate was killed, and their bond was taking him down with her.” I should feel foolish—talking to myself—but I can’t even begin to care that none of this is real because this is the first time I’ve felt comfortable enough to vocalize everything. Who knows, maybe I’ll tell myself something that will help.
“So, you bonded to a vampire to save him.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because I didn’t want him to die.”
“You’re not being honest with yourself.”
The words are right on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t bring myself to speak them aloud. Not even to myself. “We’re friends.”
“You’re more than that. Especially now.”
Especially now.Was that still true? After what I’ve become?
Tarnley’s hands on my body, his mouth on mine.The image of him beneath me as I was pinned against the wall— I shiver. “Everything changed. Now I’m probably trapped, my brain attempting to formulate scenarios to keep me mildly sane while the dark magic ravages my body.”
“That is quite a dark outlook.”
But he doesn’t deny it. “I need to get out of here…regain control.”
“Or you could stay.” He moves, positioning himself behind me and increasing the pressure as he kneads my shoulders with large, powerful hands.
It feels good, but it’s not what I want.Not who I want.At least, it hasn’t been for quite some time.
“No, I really need to go.” Pushing to my feet, I stare back at Mal, who continues to kneel on the mattress. “I hope you know how much I miss you. You were too kind for what happened to you.”
“I’d do it all over again, Bronny. Then again, you know that, don’t you?”