Lucia
“The baby needs to go to bed now,” Estelle says.
The frown on her face deepens when she looks at the books I set out to read to Mia.
“I was just going to read her a story and see if that might settle her down,” I explain.
Mia has been very upset for the last few hours, and I didn’t have the heart to leave her after bath time.
“No, no more stories.” Estelle crosses her arms and wrinkles her face. “She’s had enough of you and your stories for the day.”
That’s how she’s been talking to me since we did the ID scan. She’s been an absolute bitch, and I’m ready to snap any second now.
I don’t think she heard my phone conversation with Red, but whatever she suspects of me has been rolling out in full force since.
Mia reaches for my hair and whimpers. The poor little thing is understandably terrified because how they put her to bed is by turning off the light and just leaving her to cry herself to sleep. I don’t agree with that.
“Give her to me. And you go. Your day is officially over.”
With reluctance, I hand Mia over to Estelle. My heart breaks when Mia starts crying and reaching for me.
I’ve only known this little girl since the other day, but I already feel attached.
It has nothing to do with my ulterior motives in being here. I think it’s more because she balances me and keeps me in touch with my dreams to work with children, and dare I say it, have my own family someday.
Someday, when life isn’t a mess.
I turn away, looking over my shoulder once before leaving the room.
I head up to my room, but with a plan to go back in an hour or so to check on her.
It’s late, so chances are she’ll drift off to sleep.
Once I’m in my room, I rest my back against the closed door for a full minute before I move.
I’m tired. Mentally and physically. It’s the type of tiredness, though, that mere sleep can’t fix. I feel like I’ve been on a vicious cycle of survival, and if I stop, something bad will happen. Something will slip from my control, and I won’t be able to get a handle on anything ever again.
That call today freaked me out. I’m nowhere closer to a plan than I was when I woke.
I can’t think of anything to get what I need.
I can imagine asking Alejandro questions and then slipping up and him discovering I’m not who he thinks I am.
He’s not stupid. The moment I start fishing, he’s going to know something is off with me. If he doesn’t know already.
My feeling is he does. He’s a man who is out of my league, and the nights we’ve spent together were…
Amazing.
They were amazing, and I can’t get all that we did out of my head. I don’t want to.
I never expected him to have such an intoxicating effect on me.
Fuck, if I think about him too much, I could come right now just from the memory of how he touched me.
I shake my head at myself.
Thinking of such things isn’t going to help anyone.