I tip my head and find a towering Zander peering down at me, his entrancing face only inches away, his eyes raking over my features. We haven’t been this close since he shielded me from the oncoming arrows in the boat. Before Gesine told him about how Neilina and Aoife plotted to ensnare him.
Zander shifts his attention to the wall, smoothing his hands over the stones, his palms coming away dusty. “The lever to the outside is here, somewhere.”
I’m standing still, doing nothing. I may as well help. “What does it look like?”
“Much like the other one, only smaller.”
We’re all knees and elbows, bumping into each other as we search along the walls. It’s laughable, almost, given the kinds of things we’ve done beneath sheets and candlelight.
I spot the perfectly square block behind him, at shoulder level. “Is this it?” I tap the surface with my finger.
“That is definitely it.” He shifts, reaching for it.
“Wait!”
Gesine’s sudden outburst freezes us both in place, our hands over the same stone.
“Do not trigger anything until I say so. I may not be able to construct one of these passageways, but I can keep it from closing on us, should something else in the mechanics fail. Give me a moment.”
Zorya and Abarrane echo twin curses.
The light orb dims and then vanishes, throwing us into complete darkness as Gesine focuses all her attention on her task.
The seconds drag on.
“Those morels of hers work wonders.” Zander’s soft breaths skate against my cheek, reminding me how close we are positioned. It doesn’t help that our hands are still hovering over the stone. I pull mine away in a pathetic effort to put space between us.
I feel his eyes tracing the lines of my face in the darkness. Meanwhile, I can’t see a hint of his, no matter how hard I search.
“You can still turn back. Wait with Loth in the safety of the forest.”
“I won’t learn how to survive in this world by hiding from it.”
I sense him leaning closer, a moment before he whispers in my ear, “What is causing you so much distress? Is it simply being this close to me?”
His lips so close to me stirs a shiver. “No. I don’t like not knowing what we’re heading into.”
“That’s why I told you to stay behind.”
“I’m not worried about myself.” I can move anonymously. But what if Rengard is no longer the trusted visionary Zander hopes he is?
“I see.” The tip of his nose grazes my ear, stirring my blood. “Do you regret it?”
“Regret what?”
“Everything.”
I falter on my answer. What is he asking? Do I regret going along with Sofie’s request? I was never given a choice.
Playing Princess Romeria in order to survive? Also, no flexibility in that decision.
But I know he’s not talking about either of those things.
“Do you?”
“I should.”
I revel in this brief closeness. I can almost pretend we’re still together. “That’s not an answer.”