Luke finds Seth on the porch with a bottle of Jim Beam. His brother’s pouring out great gulps of the honey-colored liquid into two glasses. Seth glances up and grins. “Figured we needed this more than iced tea.”
“Ain’t that the truth,” Luke says, his mind still on Sal. Just touching her tonight, her warm cheek in his palm, was enough to knock him over with a feather. It left him breathless, missing her.
Fuck. He hates leaving her. It feels like one false step and she’ll fall off the edge of the earth. But he knows Sal needs space; she’s not his to keep.
“I called Ma,” Seth offers as Luke swipes a glass of whiskey and drops into a porch chair.
He cocks a brow. “So she’s already driving you to drink?”
With a laugh, Seth sits beside him. “It’s gonna be in the paper tomorrow, so I figured they oughta know before then.” Luke nods, and Seth continues. “She wants you to call her. She and Dad are dyin’ to hear what’s going on.”
“I bet they are.”
“I tossed a casserole in the oven too. Think you’re well stocked on tuna noodle.”
“Thanks, Betty Crocker.”
Seth’s lazy chuckle rolls out. “I fuckin’ hate you, man.” Then his voice turns serious. “How’s Sal?”
“Fuckin’ exhausted,” he says, sipping his whiskey. Seth follows suit. “I don’t blame her. It can’t have been easy doin’ all this, seein’ a life you don’t remember. I can’t goddamn imagine.”
Seth kicks his boots up on the porch railing. “Sal’s strong.”
Luke leans back in his chair and stares out into the neon sunset.
Sal is strong. She’s the strongest person Luke knows. It’s why he loves her, among a thousand other heart-crushing reasons. But how strong can she be? She’s been through a miscarriage, a car accident, a plane crash, being held somewhere with no memory of who she was. Now, there’s all this expectation and hope that her memory will come back.
He’s got to get his head on straight, so he can be her center. So he can give her whatever she needs.
“She is.” Seth’s deep rumble cuts into his thoughts. “You know this.”
Luke looks up to see Seth staring at him. “Thanks,” he blurts. Although words barely seem enough. He can’t adequately express his gratitude to his brother. But he’ll damn sure try. “For helpin’ out with everything. For findin’ her.”
Seth shakes his head, shakes away Luke’s words of thanks. They’re not needed. Not for his brother, and not for Sal. Then, clearing a waterlogged throat, he says, “How’d you feel about me stayin’ over a few nights?”
Luke swallows down his whiskey in one large gulp. “I think that’d be good for her.”
This is Seth’s way of protecting Sal. They’ve both been away from her for so long; they don’t want to be apart from her, even for a minute.
Pouring himself another finger of whiskey, he bites out, “Besides, she probably needs you more than me right now.”
Though he tries to keep the bitterness out of his voice, his brother’s smart. In sync since they were kids.
“Luke.” Seth sighs. “Don’t do this.”
The guilt, the past, the whiskey, courses through him. Tears fill his eyes, and he leans forward, burying his face in his hands. “I never should have put her on that plane,” he says, lost in his inner turmoil. The memories of the search for Sal. “I should have looked harder. I should have found her.”
“You never gave up on Sal,” Seth says, his voice rising as if to brace itself against any of his brother’s objections. “You and I both know there was a shot in hell she survived that crash.”
Luke raises his face. “I survived,” he shoots back. “And so did Sal. She was alive, and I left her there.”
“That sick fuck took her, Luke. Hell, he probably had her the entire time we were doin’ search and rescue.”
Rage shakes Seth’s voice. It’s a rage Luke’s been holding on to as well.
It goes against every instinct Luke has not to track this guy down. Some sick motherfucker lays hands on his wife? You hurt Sal, you don’t live. It’s that simple. But that would mean hurting Sal. That would mean going to that dark place again, and Luke can’t. Not when Sal needs him.
Somewhere in the distance, the horses whinny, followed by the howl of a freight train. Seth leans over to clap his brother on the shoulder. “Listen. Sal’s safe, she’s here with you, and she ain’t goin’ anywhere again.”