I considered the question. For a split second, everything I knew about dating kicked into gear. That wasn’t how relationships worked. Women wanted loyalty, devotion, and consideration, but the more I thought… the more my initial thoughts disappeared. Warren and I wouldn’t have to compete for Millie. There would be no loser in this scenario, and besides that, what did I honestly know of Millie’s desire in a relationship? If we could all make her happy, who was I to deny her that pleasure? Any piece of Millie I could have would be beyond welcome. Even if I only had her for one hour, I would make that moment last a lifetime.
“I think… I might,” I realized slowly. “It would be her call, but if you’re willing, I think I am too. I’ve known you for a long time. I don’t know Vlad, but he must be a good enough guy. If Millie wanted to explore each relationship, I’m not going to stop her.”
Warren nodded again in understanding. “I know what you mean. I guess it’ll be her call, as you say.”
“I guess we have a new deal, then?”
“Sounds like it.”
Shaking on it, it felt strange to be making this new deal, to consider sharing Millie, but it felt like the best scenario. The worse problem was having to walk across campus to my office and find her there, waiting with another cranberry bran muffin and a masked expression.
I didn’t want to face her, but I had no choice. Just because my heart had been pulled through the ringer over the last twelve hours didn’t mean I had to stop being friendly. I walked in the office, prepared to pretend that nothing was wrong. I set her coffee down on her desk with a smile. Her hair was piled high on the crown of her head, and the sweep of her palest pink camisole brought out the strawberry milk tones of her skin and draped perfectly over her neckline. Her black cardigan was already off, giving me a glimpse of the flowers blossoming against her back again.
Trying not to stare, I didn’t know how she could be a vixen one day and an angel the next. I figured that was just the wonderful duplicity of women.
“Professor Harrow,” she greeted me softly.
“Caleb,” I reminded her. “I hope you’re feeling better.”
“I wasn’t sick,” she admitted.
I was starting to put the pieces together. Thinking of the note she left and Warren’s story, I had puzzled that one out for myself.
“Well, that’s good,” I replied. “Why did you leave then?”
“I was feeling out of sorts, but I did work from home.”
I knew that too. I’d seen the cloud drive getting more use yesterday afternoon. It made me almost feel bad, but that was when I thought Millie was somehow working while dealing with some kind of bug.
“You can relax, Millie,” I told her. “I’m not mad that you left, and, well, Warren told me about what happened.”
“You’re not upset?”
I shrugged. “Call me crazy, but I don’t think I have a right to be.”
“It’s just…”
“What?”
“Nothing,” she swore instead, forcing a smile onto her face. “I just didn’t want things to be ruined between us.”
It was my turn to sweat. As I set down my bag, I wondered how to mention the pact Warren and I had. Millie needed to know. I wanted her to understand, but it didn’t feel like the right time. I was tired, and there was more than enough work to be done before my mid-morning classes.
“Don’t worry, Millie,” I assured her, handing over her usual mug of coffee. “Nothing you can do will change where I stand. I’ll always be here. I’ll always enjoy our time together, and if I can support you in any way, I will.”
Millie exhaled in relief. I could see that she had been thinking about me, and it was touching. Her face softened with that undeniable dreaminess. It made me remember why I was so willing to share Millie in the first place. Any piece of her heart, any moment of her time, would be an absolute pleasure to have. Even as her fingers brushed against mine as she took the travel mug from my hands, I felt the thrill of pining desire begging me to keep her close.
“Thank you,” she said with such warmth in her expression and tone. “It means a lot to hear you say that.”
It felt the permission we both needed to relax into our usual morning routine. As I settled into my desk, Millie came over as she usually did to bug me about work for the day. She was on top of her game and doing her best to move me toward publication. I tried to pay attention to the work in front of me. When a student arrived outside of office hours and wanted to talk, Millie packed up her laptop and gave us some privacy.
When I got back from classes for our working lunch, she offered to buy. It was nice. Even if it was a little out of character for Millie, I let her do it. I’d forgotten to pack anything except the coffee, and humoring her seemed to put a smile on her face.
We had Chinese takeout. Millie called it in like a perfect secretary, making sure that they added extra sauce and extra rice. When the food arrived, she paid for it with cash, arranging it on my desk so that we could share.
“Bring your chair over,” I suggested.
She obliged, pushing her chair up to the side of my desk. With her so close, I began to smell her perfume over the strong scent of garlic, salt, and spice. I’d seen how she pressed the little roller ball to her pulse points some days. I also knew her hand cream smelled like vanilla too. There had been so many things I’d picked up over our days together, but as she ate a bite of her chicken, I knew I needed more than moments like this.