I shake off his words and leave, knowing he’s right. Meeting up with Annie is a bad idea. It was a bad idea yesterday too. That doesn’t stop me from going, though.
When I arrive at Annie’s, I find her sitting on the dog bed by the back door, presumably waiting for me. Banjo runs to greet me, and I give him a quick pat. Annie stands as I approach, arms crossed and shoulders lifted. She looks nervous. Her hair’s slightly damp, like she’s just had a shower. I try not to read too much into that.
‘Come in,’ she says, leading the way.
I follow her into the kitchen, looking around at the aged cupboards and stained benchtop. Everything’s clean, though. A fruit bowl sits on the counter, full of mandarins. It’s strange that I’ve lived across the creek from her my whole life, but I’ve never seen inside her house.
I rest my hip on the bench and look down at her. ‘What’s next on the list, Wilson?’
She uncrosses her arms. ‘I’d like to watch a horror movie.’
‘Today?’
She shakes her head. ‘I’d want to go to a cinema, probably in the city. I know Turram is closest, but I can’t risk being spotted there.’
I nod slowly. ‘And you want me to come with you?’
‘If you want to. We could go after exams.’
I watch her carefully. ‘Okay.’
She shifts her weight. ‘And I thought I might skip to the next thing on the list in the meantime.’
‘Which is?’
She drops her gaze to the ground between us. ‘I’d like to know how to… reciprocate.’
My entire body is paying attention now. ‘Reciprocate?’
Colour rises to her cheeks. ‘I feel bad about yesterday.’
‘Because of what we did?’
She still won’t look at me. ‘Yes. But also for what we didn’t do.’ She swallows audibly, then clears her throat. ‘What I didn’t do. I just didn’t know…’
She’s the sweetest thing—and she’s killing me. ‘Did it seem like I wasn’t enjoying myself?’
Finally she lifts her eyes to me. ‘No, but—’
‘It’s not a debt to be settled.’
‘I know.’ She clasps her hands together to stop from fidgeting. ‘Did I seem like I was enjoying myself?’
The memory of her back lifting off the grass and her fingernails pressing into my scalp flashes in my mind. ‘I think so.’
She tilts her head. ‘And did you like that?’
I fucking loved it. ‘Sure.’
‘Because I think I’d like it too. Seeing you, I mean.’
The affection and lust I feel for this girl right now are unsettling. ‘I suppose I could teach you, since you don’t appear to hate me after yesterday.’
‘I don’t have time to hate you. Self-loathing is a full-time job.’ She offers me a weak smile.
It’s funny and tragic at the same time.
‘Mum will be home at six,’ she says. ‘Will that be enough time?’
I laugh. ‘It’s four o’clock. I think we’re safe.’
She steps up to me, threading her fingers through mine. This is how it started yesterday. This is what she knows. The fact that the gesture already feels familiar blows my mind.
Pushing up on her toes, she whispers against my mouth, ‘Tell me what to do.’
I reach between her legs, touching her through her jeans. ‘There’s something I need to take care of first.’