Chapter Thirty-Nine
Noah
The sightof her peaceful face was fucking priceless. Her skin was as pale as the moonlight; her long, wavy hair a fiery contradiction to the calm that veiled her as the grandfather clock in the living room struck two.
I could sit in the dark like a fucking vampire and watch her sleep for hours. It was during the early morning hours that I would try and figure out the enigma that was us. Try to understand how, after years of refusing to let go of my past, this redhead literally came out of nowhere and made me want something I firmly believed I didn’t deserve.
A new life.
A happy life.
Love.
Sienna didn’t take no for an answer. She convinced me not to be afraid to fall. And that’s what I did. I fell. For her.
The longing I had for her over the last couple of weeks was crippling. And once I saw her again through a goddamn window, it became a goddamn ticking time bomb that exploded against the cabin wall when I could no longer fight my urge to fuck her. It stemmed from deep inside my bones–the need to mark her. To claim her. To possess her.
Her taste alone was enough to tip me over the edge, her honey lips and velvet tongue igniting a fire that only a release could extinguish. A release I found deep between her legs.
After our shower, she fell asleep in my arms like it was the most natural thing for her. As if no time had passed with us apart. I couldn’t deny it. We were just better together. And in the shower, when she asked me to promise I’d never leave her again, the words burned the tip of my tongue. I wanted to say the promise out loud. I wanted to engrave it in my bones and burn it into my soul. But I knew the priceshe’dhave to pay formeto be able to keep that promise. And I wasn’t sure whether I was willing for her to pay that price even though it was possible we might not have another choice.
I was no longer the Esposito cartel’s target.
For years they hunted me, chased every trail I left so they could find me. But only because I was a man with nothing left to lose but my life. Often I wondered if it wouldn’t have been easier if I had handed myself over to them; to just finally end it all. Some days I would think about just ending it myself. But neither was an option for me because of a promise I had made years ago. A promise I intended to keep. A promise I had hoped I would have fulfilled by now. But it seemed that fate had other things in mind.
Sienna stirred, and I sighed, crossing the room and slipping into bed with her. I wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer, her warm body like silk against mine. The scent of her hair, the feel of her presence, the sound of her rhythmic breathing—it was paradise to me. It was a man with a lost soul’s definition of heaven.
She nestled closer, placing a palm on my hand that touched her stomach. “I love you,” she whispered into the dark, and I was sure my heart would fucking burst.
Three words I never dreamt of ever hearing again.
Three words that were dangerous to a man like me…because it gave me hope.
* * *
Sienna
My heart leaped into my throat when I woke up, this harrowing feeling tightening around my chest as a voice echoed in my head.He’s gone.
I jolted up and looked to the right, letting out a breath of relief when I found Noah still sleeping soundly next to me.
“Fuck, Sienna,” I whispered, placing a palm on my forehead. “Get a goddamn grip.”
I snuck out of bed, careful not to wake him, pulled one of his shirts over my head and tip-toed out of the bedroom. It was just before eight, and the sun was still low in the morning sky. The arched cathedral glass windows created beautiful reflections of light against the wooden logs.
Last night I was too preoccupied to appreciate the living space; too caught up in my own head and this royally fucked up situation with Noah.
Dust glimmered in the air as I took off all the white sheets from the furniture. Dark leather couches with golden studs stood by the windows; a plush white carpet draped across the floor. It was perfect in its simplicity, except for the bathroom that was anythingbut simple, and that clawfoot bathtub was precisely what I needed.
A glance at the walk-in shower sent heat to my cheeks, reminding me of the events that led up to Noah and I ending up in that shower. It was crazy how explosive we were together. How our bodies demanded with wild desire; the blood in our veins searing our flesh with a fire we so willingly burned in. We could go at each other’s throats and still fucking find pleasure in it.
There was a whole shelf stacked with bath salts, oils, and bubble baths to choose from. I went through every one and picked the pretty glass bottle with a round crystal knob lid.
Silky suds lathered on the water, the scent of lemongrass slowly swirling around the room.
As the bathtub filled, I took Noah’s shirt, running the fabric between my fingertips, my heart swelling inside my chest, knowing he was back. The thought of him was like the thread that weaved all the broken pieces of my heart together, slowly healing, making it whole.
I found a drawer with bobby pins and loosely pinned my curls up in a messy bun, then turned to the side, placing a palm on my belly. There was no change yet. My body still looked the same, yet it wasn’t. Not at all. Life grew inside me. A baby. Noah’s baby.