I’m a fucking monster.
I pace back and forth, my head in my hands as I try to figure this out.
And then the doorbell rings and my heart damn near shatters. I feel my fists tighten as I storm back into the hallway, and a moment later I see her, walking down the stairs, an expression of disdain and hate plastered all over her face as she stalks past me, and my blood boils all over again as I see that she’s changed.
Her long pale legs flick past me as I stand impotent, staring at her. Her barely contained flesh stuffed into the same denim short-shorts she was wearing before, her hips rolling back and forth below a practically sheer-lace lingerie top, her navy blue bra visible underneath, her phone stuffed into her back pocket, and a black choker tied around her neck.
I want to scream at her, to ban her from leaving the house, but I am so fucking angry that I can’t say anything at all, and I watch steaming as she rips open the front door.
And there stands Kyle.
Six foot tall, built like a fucking chad, and his jaw drops as Mackenzie stands before him.
‘Whoa,’ he says. ‘Alright.’
That’s it? That’s all you fucking got? I rage internally. She’s the most beautiful goddamn creature in the fucking universe and you say, Whoa. Alright.
‘Hey,’ says Mackenzie, but it sounds distant as I feel the blood pumping through my ears. ‘Are you ready?’ she says.
‘Yeah,’ he nods, looking her up and down again, and I want to tear his fucking eyeballs out and feed them to him. ‘Let’s go.’
And then she pulls the door closed with a click, and I put my fist through the fucking wall.
*
At least I chose the right clothes for the occasion. I sigh, watching as Kyle knocks the black ball toward the corner pocket, cheering prematurely. If I’d stuck with that dress I’d be sticking out like a sore thumb right now, I think to myself as I breathe and nearly choke on the stench of raspberry vape.
A pool bar.
I pick at the label of my beer bottle as I swing my legs back and forth on the bar stool, pulling the sticky material out from under my fingernails. They never even asked for my ID card here, which tells me all I need to know about this place. I don’t look twenty-one, not even close, but the bearded bartender didn’t even flinch and my fake ID stayed put in my back pocket.
Kyle’s opponent, apparently his best friend who just so happened to be here tonight on his own, scowls as the ball sinks in, slamming his cue down on the table and shaking his head.
‘Fucking asshole,’ he says, tugging his wallet out and throwing a twenty down, then he pulls out a second and says. ‘Double or nothing,’ and I close my eyes and shrink.
I don’t know what I was expecting, but this wasn’t it. I’m not even sure if this is a date.
My phone buzzes in my back pocket and I tingle with excitement. Maybe it’s Mr Ledger, apologising for being a chronic fucking asshole. I tug it out of my back pocket and look at the screen, but it’s Felicity.
How’s the date going? X
I laugh, shaking my head as my thumbs begin to type.
Awful. I’m sitting at the bar on my own watching him play pool with his best friend, who he hasn’t even introduced me to x
Fuck. You need a 911? X
I sigh, looking down at the floor and thinking. I can’t go home early. He’d be so fucking smug he’d never let it go. I need to stick this out. I need to punish him, make him think it’s going great and I’m having wild sex in the back of this asshole’s car.
No. I’m going to see how it goes. It’s still early x
You’re brave. Text me if you need me. I’ll be there x
Thank you xxx
Fuck.
I spin round in my seat and wave my bottle and the bartender snaps me up a new one, swiping the empty away with the same hand before I spin back and chug, wiping my lips and leaning back, but then Kyle is approaching with a wild grin on his face flexing two twenty-dollar bills and a sparkle in his eye.