Graham
“Is thatpoop,or mud? Fuck, I hope it’s mud.”
It’s not a question I imagined myself ever hearing, but seeing as how we’re all dads now, except Asher and Hudson, it makes perfect sense.
“Mm can’t tell, but damn, if that’s poop, I feel bad for you.” Asher shudders.
Reed squints, trying to get a better look at Evan, who’s covered in whatever it is from the waist down. “Evan, come see me, buddy!”
Evan walks over, sporting a cheeky grin, and a stick that’s twice his size. My money’s on mud, but honestly, it could go either way. I don’t smell anything, so that’s a good sign.
“Did you have an accident?” Reed asks.
Evan shakes his head. “I fell down chasing that girl.” He points out toward the outdoor playground, where there’s a little girl playing with Olive, although she looks to be more Evan’s age. She’s got pink bows on her pigtails and a mischievous grin.
Ahhhh, makes sense now. I pulled quite a few pigtails in my days too.
“What did I say about chasing girls?” Reed says sternly.
“Not to.”
Reed nods. “They don’t like bugs and lizards, so we don’t torment them. Okay bud?”
Evan nods. “Well, Olive likes lizards AND bugs.”
Reed pinches the bridge of his nose and exhales. “Ev…” His tone is a warning.
Evan just shrugs and darts off back toward the playground.
I also never imagined me and my friends clad with all of our kids, having a guys’ day out at the park… but here we are. It’s funny how life changes. You trade the bars for dads’ day out at the park, and beer for bottles.
Reed’s got Ava Kate strapped to his chest while Evan plays on the playground with Brigg’s little girl, Olive, as his newborn Dexter sleeps in the stroller. I’ve got both of my girls, Charlotte sleeping in her stroller, and Quinn against my chest as she sleeps.
Honestly, we’re a bunch of hockey players, who are domesticated as fuck, wearing babies and pushing strollers. We own it too, loud and proud. Love does funny shit to you.
“What are the girls up to today?” Hudson asks. We find a picnic table, with a good view of the playground, and all sit.
“The last I heard, mimosas, manis and pedis, and something about waxing.” Reed shrugs. “I told Holland to go shopping, but it was hard enough to get her out the door and leave the kids behind.”
“Woah, woah, woah, wait, can Em and Holland even do that… I mean, they just pushed out actual humans down there…” Asher’s eyes are wide as saucers, and I sort of want to punch him in the face for thinking about my girl's… area, but he does pose a logical question.
“I’m sure they’ve got it under control, Asher,” Reed says, shaking his head.
Asher shrugs, and goes back to scrolling on his phone.
“Yeah,” Briggs says, “Maddison wanted to stay in her pajamas and binge watch tv, but I told her she needed a day out with the girls. Plus, we needed a guys’ day. It’s been a while, and I feel like I’ve been up to my eyeballs in diapers, and fuckingCocomelon.”
We all groan.
“Fucking Cocomelon. If I have to see that baldheaded ass baby one more time, I’m going to walk off a cliff.” Reed grumbles. “I can’t take it anymore. I swear that shit was invented to make parents question their life choices.”
I’m sure all parents can agree on that. My girls aren’t old enough yet, but hell, I’ve seen it enough around Olive to last me a lifetime. I dread the days when the girls are interested in it.
I feel like time is moving at warped speed, yet slowly at the same time. Every day has dragged on, but when I blink, a week has passed. In the last six weeks, Em and I have been barely more than strangers. We talk about the girls and coexist, but she’s still shut down.
Still won’t talk to me. Still won’t look me in the eye, and I’m losing my fucking mind. I keep trying to talk to her, to get her to open up, but if anything, she’s retreated further into herself. I miss her so goddamn much. I miss her smile and her laugh. I miss holding her. I miss touching her.
I’ve had to stop myself from reaching out to hold her hand, or sneak a kiss when I pass by her at least a million times. I got a smile out of her two days ago, and I swear the world shifted beneath my feet, only to cruelly remind me that things are still a broken mess between us, with no end in sight.