Did I worry about them all every minute of every day?
Absolutely.
But I’d known when I’d married into the Grassi Family and started having kids of my own, that the boys were going to follow in their father’s and uncles’ footsteps.
It honestly hadn’t ever occurred to me that our only daughter might have wanted the same thing for herself.
“I’m a million times better a shot than he is,” she added, talking about one of her cousins that had just been granted the job that had once belonged to Massimo, and then one of the cousins after him, allowing my man to be home with me a lot more sometime around the time our youngest was toddling.
“I know you are,” I agreed.
All our kids had learned their ways around guns at a relatively young age. Because we had them in the house. Because Massimo thought that education prevented accidents, even though we made sure everything was always away from the kids.
The boys had all been, you know, decent. Good shots. Good enough that we knew they could protect themselves if something happened and they needed to.
Our girl, though?
Our girl was something special.
She had her father’s skills.
Actually, Massimo had admitted to me once, she was even better.
And when you were the best at something, I could understand being furious that someone with less skills than you got a job you wanted.
Though I worried a bit that she wanted a job like that in the first place.
“I just… have you ever wondered if it is healthy that you want this job so much?”
“Would you ask my brothers that question?” Calla shot back, dark brows raised.
“That’s not what I meant. I do understand you wanting to be a part of the Family, but I don’t understand an actualdesireto do this particular job, baby. I mean your father did it because it was needed and he was good at it, not because he particularly wanted to do that job. I worry about your outlook on mankind.”
“Mom, have youmetmankind lately?” she asked, shaking her head. “Themanpart, in particular, of mankind? And these aren’t even the so-called ‘good’ guys. These are all verified bad dudes. Who have done bad things. Who are threatening our Family. I could do something about that. I could keep everyone safer.”
“But at a lot of risk to you,” Massimo said, coming in behind her, and I didn’t miss the deep exhale our girl let out, knowing she was now going to be outnumbered in her argument.
“Dad, please. You’re still standing. Mike is still standing. What risk? The job is usually from far away. Besides, you wouldn’t say this to my brothers. This is a ridiculous, sexist organization where the men do all the dangerous stuff, and the women are supposed to make pasta and play with babies. I can’t wait for the power shift,” she added, storming out the back door.
“You know… if Luca’s son takes over, there is a good chance she will be allowed to do the job,” I said, looking over at Massimo.
There was some distinguishing gray in his hair now, a couple of smile lines on his face. I found I loved the changes. The evidence of our happy years together.
“Oh, baby, she’sgoingto have my old job one day,” Massimo said, coming around the counter toward me. “It’s just my job as an old-timer to give her as much shit as possible about it first. It’s a right of passage.”
“I don’t like that she’s going to have your old job,” I told him as his arms went around me.
“I know.”
“I’m a little worried that I am almost equally upset that she has such an aversion to making pasta,” I added, getting a laugh out of Massimo.
I worried, at times, that the kids didn’t see me as anyone but a meal maker and a errand runner.
But over the years after moving in with Massimo, I discovered that there just… wasn’t some grander plan for me. I didn’t have any outside-of-the-house passions.
I was passionate about my kids, about my husband, about our family.
So I never did go out and open a business or go back to school.