Chapter 6.
I DIDN’T WANT TO RUSH this time.
Instead, I felt an overwhelming need to make it last. The future wasn’t certain, or set,
and I wasn’t sure I would survive tomorrow. I didn’t know where we would be tomorrow or the day after that or the day after that. All I had was here, now, this moment with him.
That instinct for survival, for making every day count, made this moment, oh so special.
I stood up and began to undress, enjoying the way his gaze followed my every move. Lingered in places, made me feel beautiful. My breath caught in my throat as his eyes flicked up to mine, heat and desire whirling within his gaze.
It was strange, this overwhelming sense of beauty I felt when he looked at me, as though I was some kind of miracle he had never set his eyes on before. I had never felt beautiful before, and yet, when I was with Tavlor, I felt it in spades.
I stopped when I got down to my underwear, wanting a barrier between us so I didn’t get too distracted when he touched me. I wanted to be in control this time. I wanted to focus on all the little things that made up who he was, and I couldn’t have him distracting me with the magic that seemed to live in his fingertips.
What sort of damage had the women in his past done to him, to make him feel so un-loveable? So ugly. I didn’t even like to think about it because I got mad.
I was going to undo it all. I had to. I couldn’t stand the fact that he didn’t see himself the way I did.
And there was only one way to do it. I was going to love him. Worship him. Tell him every day how gorgeous I thought he was.
I grinned at him and tried to give him a ‘come hither’ look, though whether or not I succeeded was a different question. “Stand up, I want to undress you.”
Tavlor moved to his feet and stood like a statue, frozen in place.
That was totally fine. I could work with that. I tugged at his robes, grinning as I unveiled each piece of his strong physique.
“God... you’re so... perfect. How did I get so lucky?” I whispered as I ran my hands over his chest, loving each hard ridge of hot muscle.
He shuddered beneath my touch.
From my words, or my affection, I wasn’t sure.
My fingertips grazed his chest, tracing the edge of his collarbone. He slowly inhaled, a sharp sound that reminded me there was more to his body that his front side.
I walked around his body, slowly... watching him tense as I ran my fingers over his back. The massive muscles in his shoulders, his smooth, hot skin.
My fingertips found creases of scar tissue, evidence of the battles he’d fought.
“Don’t...” he whispered, tensing, but not stopping me in my explorations.
I could tell how hard he was trying to fight the need to stop me. How much he wanted me to just lay down on the bed and ignore him the way we’d done it last time.
I wasn’t doing that. Not today. He needed to be loved, worshipped, in every way I wanted to.
“Don’t what?” I whispered, stepped closer, wrapping my arms around his waist and pressing my breasts against his back. “Don’t love this body of yours? Don’t you want me to know how hard you fight? How strong you are? To admire how far you’ve come, to be here with me.” I pressed my lips to his back. “I love all of you. Don’t hide anything from me.”
He shuddered again and this time a soft moan filled the air around us.
I circled back around, smiling up at him as I dropped to my knees and began undoing the laces on his pants.
This part of him terrified me a little. Besides him, I hadn’t had any experience with this. I wanted to make sure, more than anything, that I was doing it right, in a way that pleased him. My stomach tightened and fear made adrenaline course along my legs. But there was something else in my belly. Excited butterflies that told me that he intrigued me just as much.
Because, I yearned to accumulate this knowledge for myself, and I was so glad I got to learn with him.
As his pants fell to the floor and his flesh sprung up to point at my face, heat flowed between my thighs. I curled my fingers into loose fists. I didn’t want to touch him right away. I wanted to stare, to take him in with my eyes.
Yes, definitely more than a little intrigued...