Her voice trailed off, and she went to turn away from me, but I stopped her.
“Wait,” I said, lifting my hand to her face. When her breath hitched, mine did as well.
I reached for a strand of her hair, pulling out the small bit of paint. “You still have paint in your hair.”
Her cheeks flushed. “No thanks to you. I still can’t believe you dumped that over my head.”
“That was fun, I think we both needed it.”
Chewing on her lip, she nodded.
“Mom sent me home with some chicken pot pie and salad. I’m starving. Early dinner?”
“That sounds amazing. What about all this?”
“We can clean it later.”
Without thinking, I reached for her hand. She didn’t attempt to pull it away, so I didn’t drop it until we walked into the kitchen. I started to unpack the bag of food.
“I’ll grab something to heat it up in,” Paige said, taking out two bowls. “A bowl okay?”
“Grab two. She made a salad, too.”
We worked in silence, moving around the kitchen like the last week hadn’t even happened. All the tossed insults, the moments when we’d both let our weakness get the better of us. And then there were the words we’d spoken last night. That was what I wanted to talk to her about. To set her straight on a few things.
“Do you want to eat on the porch?” she asked, nodding toward the back door. “It’s a beautiful day out.”
“Yeah, that sounds nice. I’ll grab the waters. Do you still like Ranch? Mom packed some.”
She gave me a look that silently asked if I was being serious. “Seriously? Who doesn’t like Ranch?”
I wanted to say Bianca but decided it was best not to bring her up, at least not right now.
Once we got settled, Paige pushed a forkful of potpie into her mouth and groaned. The noise went straight to my dick. And just like the asshole I was, I was instantly hard.
“Paige, I wanted to talk to you about what you said last night.”
Her face fell, and she looked out over backyard and off into the trees. On the other side of the trees and pathway sat the greenhouse, and beyond that a wide-open pasture.
“I never meant to make you think I was comparing you to Bianca in any way. That morning when you made the muffins, it was fucking refreshing to see actual food. By the way, those muffins were amazing. Did you make them from a box?”
She gave me a soft smile. “No, from scratch.”
I fell in love with her more.
“And your comment about your weight…I feel like everything I’ve been saying has been coming out wrong. You look amazing. You’re beautiful, and I’m not saying that to try and make you feel better. When I walked up the pathway and saw you on this porch, talking and laughing with Milo, I couldn’t even form words.”
She looked at me. “You formed words. If I remember right, an insult or two.”
I looked down, embarrassed. “I was trying hard to hide how I was feeling.”
Her head tilted. “How were you feeling?”
My eyes met hers. “Confused. Excited to see you. Angry at myself for ever letting you go in the first place.”
When her face morphed into shock, I let out an unsure chuckle and kept going. “My heart was pounding in my chest and I wasn’t sure why. Seeing you brought back every single memory we shared, every dream we had, every touch we exchanged. And then that pissed me off.”
“Why would that piss you off?”
“I don’t really know how to explain it. I think it all just hit me. The guilt I felt for moving on after you.”
“Lucas, I dated other guys, as well.”
I shook my head. “That’s not it, Paige. You asked me to trust you, to let you follow your own path, and I was so fucking scared you would pull away from me that I let you go before you could hurt me. I tried to hide the fact that I knew I had made a terrible mistake by being mad at you, even though I knew it had all been me. Then I sort of got lost for a while. Searched for someone to take away your memory, and that’s when I met Bianca. She was the complete opposite of you. The only problem was, I still couldn’t get over you. She knew it, too. Shortly after we started dating she found an engagement ring, and she got pretty damn excited. That was when she planned our first trip. Paris. I can’t even begin to tell you the guilt I felt, going with her to Europe when it was you who had asked me to go with you first.”
Paige’s eyes glassed over, but she kept her tears at bay.
“Anyway, Bianca had a modeling gig there, we stayed for a week or so and then came home. She was in a foul mood when we got back, and when I asked her what was wrong, she asked about the ring. Let’s just say it didn’t go over well when I told her that I had bought it way before her and it had been meant for my old girlfriend. For you.”