8
Ben
I leave the fishing trip early. I can’t get Jenny out of my head, the look on her face when I yelled at her. Even though I did it for her own good, I went about it all wrong. I’m still worried that my ex will destroy the both of us if she finds out we’re together, but I can’t let her rule my life forever. She’s already done enough damage as it is.
I need to find Jenny and apologize. But when I get back to the cabin, I see that she’s not home. None of the girls are. Annie told me she’d stay and watch the boys.
I search the cabin, finding the boys playing with their hand-held video games in the living room.
“Where are the girls?” I ask.
They look at each other, then look at me and shrug. Clearly Annie had made some threats about telling on her because they aren’t very forthcoming with the information.
“Whatever Annie threatened you with, you better believe I can do worse. And I’ll start by taking those video games from you,” I say.
I reach out to take them, but my son is quick to spill. “I heard them say they were going to some club in town to meet boys.”
My stomach drops. Not at the idea of my daughters going out with boys; they’re over eighteen and that’s a given. But the thought of Jenny finding someone else kills me. It’s probably what would be easier for her in the long run, but the selfish part of me wants to keep her all to myself.
My mind starts to wonder about all the trouble the girls could be getting into and worry and jealousy take over. Thinking that my daughters and the girl I love are out there alone with no one to take care of them when this is a town full of horny kids looking to have a summer fling has my blood boiling. I have to find them.
Luckily it’s a small town and there can’t be too many clubs. Except it turns out there are more than I thought, and some of them are more secretive than others. I look in several places and don’t find any trace of them. As I’m driving down the road in my truck, windows down, I hear a scream and I know it’s Jenny’s voice.
I speed toward the sound of the voice and find myself in a sketchy alley behind a dive bar. Jenny is standing in the middle of the alley looking terrified. A boy twice her size is moving toward her and he doesn’t look too happy. When he grabs her by the arm, I throw my truck into park and flash my high beams, getting his attention. When the kid looks my way, holding his hand up to block the glare, I grab him by the throat and pin him against the wall. The piece of shit looks ready to piss his pants. He has no problem picking on a young girl but doesn’t have the balls enough to stand up to a man.
I want to bash his skull against the wall for touching Jenny, but I think I’ve already put the fear of God into him.
“You ever touch anyone like that ever again, I’m going to find you and rip your balls off, do you understand me?” I growl at him.
The kid nods vigorously, and as soon as I let go of him, he runs back into the club.
I reach out to Jenny who is cowered against the wall, but when I touch her hand, she pushes me away.
“Why the hell are you here?” she demands.
I know she’s mad at me and she has every right to be. I fight the urge to take her and hold her against me and tell her how wrong I was for ever thinking I could let her go that easily.
“The boys said you guys went out to the club and I know how horny guys on summer vacation can be. You shouldn’t be out alone,” I say.
“I’m not alone. I’m here with Annie and Tulip.”
“Yeah? Were they going to protect you from that asshole who had his hands on you?”
She tries to walk past me but I step in front of her.
“Why do you even care?” she says, raising her voice. Not quite yelling, but far from the sweet, friendly Jenny I love. “Clearly you didn’t care the other night. And you haven’t seemed to care since then.”
I take her by the shoulders and force her to look into my eyes. “Of course I care, Jenny. That’s why I wanted you to stay away from me.” My voice is too loud. I’m yelling at her, but it’s not her I’m frustrated with. It’s my damn ex-wife and this whole situation. I hate that Jenny and I have to see each other in secret, and it has gotten to a point where we don’t see each other at all.
“Get in the damn truck. I’m taking you home.”
She wriggles out of my grip and gives me a look so angry it makes me grimace. “I’m not going anywhere with you. I’m eighteen. I can do what I want. You can’t choose to dismiss me, then tell me what to do.”
My frustration is about to boil over, and then suddenly that anger turns to regret and then grief. Jenny tries to get away from me when I go to grab her, but I’m faster than she is. When I have her in my grip, I kiss her. This time she doesn’t try to escape me. Her lips part and she sighs as though not kissing me had been hurting her just as much as it had been hurting me. It’s as if we’d both been holding our breath since we parted and this is the first time we’re able to breathe again. This kiss is the salve for the open wound not being with her has caused.
When we part, I brush the hair out of her eyes. She’s wearing too much makeup, I notice. She looks beautiful, but she’s so much prettier without anything covering it up. And I hate it because I know she put on all that makeup to attract other guys. I only want her to try to get my attention. No one else.
“You’re being reckless,” I tell her. “You could’ve been hurt. Or worse.”
“I’m not reckless,” she says, her voice coming out as a whisper.
“Yes you are. If you weren’t, you never would’ve tried to make things work with you and me.”
I kiss her again. This time it’s me being the reckless one. When our kiss ends, her eyes well up with tears and she starts to cry. I hate that I’m the reason for those tears. “I was so mad at you for pushing me away. I want to be with you more than anything. Why do you get to decide what’s good or bad for me?”
“Being with me will cause a rift that will ripple into all facets of your life. It will affect your friendship with my children, with your parents, and my ex will find a way to ruin you. That’s what she does. She hurts people.”
Jenny lifts her head stubbornly. The look on her face is meant to be tough, but it’s too cute for that and I try not to smile. “Being without you hurts more than anything your ex can do to me,” she says. “I love you. Isn’t that obvious? Isn’t that enough?”
Her words hit me like a brick to the heart. I know that I love her and I hoped that she loved me too, but hearing them and knowing it’s real changes everything. I’m both thrilled and horrified at the same time. The consequences of what our love could cause is frightening. Going through with this relationship could ruin everything for both of us.
“You’re better off with someone your own age, someone who doesn’t come with all this baggage,” I tell her. I hate every word that comes out of my mouth. It’s not fair that we have to hide anything. We’re both adults capable of making our own decisions, and yet our choices aren’t our own. Our choices affect everyone around us.
“I’ve tried to fall for others,” Jenny says. “I’ve tried all sorts of ways. We don’t get to choose who we fall in love with. The only person I’ve ever wanted was you.”
I wrap my arms around her and lift her off the ground. “I love you too. I love you so damn much.”
“Dad?” a voice behind us says.
My heart drops at the sound of that voice and my stomach curdles.
I put Jenny back on the ground and turn to see Tulip and Annie standing in the doorway of the club.