He seems amused. ‘Yeah.’
I feel vaguely miffed. ‘How come they never ask me to babysit?’
‘They love their kids, Dom,’ he says with a perfectly straight face.
I scowl. ‘What the fuck is that supposed to mean?’
He raises both his hands in mock surrender. ‘Hold your fire. Just kidding. It’s probably because you don’t know the first thing about babies.’
‘How much is there to know?’
He grins. ‘Can you change a diaper?’
Changing diapers! Of course not. ‘Can you?’ I ask, genuinely surprised. See what I mean about my brother being a dark horse.
He shrugs carelessly. ‘Sure.’
‘When did you learn to do that?’
‘Had a girlfriend who had a kid,’ he explains casually.
‘How difficult is it?’
He pops the last bit of cake into his mouth and says, ‘Piece of cake.’
‘So why won’t they trust me to babysit?’
He puts the box of cakes down on a cabinet and turns to me. There’s a curious expression on his face. ‘Do you want to?’
I look down at the kids and hesitate.
Shane begins to smile. That ‘stupid, see, I knew you couldn’t do it’ smile.
It gets my back up. ‘Yeah, I do,’ I say nonchalantly.
‘OK, I’ll let you get on with it then.’
‘Wait a minute. Where are you going?’
He looks at his watch. ‘If I leave now, I could take Tanya out to dinner.’
I frown. ‘You’re going to leave them both here with me? Alone?’
‘That’s the plan. Unless you think … you can’t cope.’
I look at the children. They’re sitting on the floor like two little angels. They stare back at me with big, curious eyes. Of course I can do it. What can possibly go wrong? If Shane can …
‘No, go ahead,’ I tell Shane. ‘Have fun. I can manage.’
But Shane has me figured pretty good. He’s already pulling his T-shirt over his head and striding toward his bedroom. He comes back into the room in a clean T-shirt. My brother is so good-looking he doesn’t even need to run a fucking brush through his hair.
‘Right then,’ he says cheerfully. ‘All their stuff is in the spare bedroom. In an hour’s time, warm the milk already prepared in the bottles and just give it to them.’
I nod slowly.
‘You sure about this?’
‘Have fun, Shane.’