Chapter 42
"Ok,"I said, looking between both guys. "Now, tell me this isn't some setup?"
"It's not a setup," Ty promised immediately. "Truth is, I'd much rather you stay away from that crazy motherfucker. I want to tell him that I found you first, but he pointed out that you aren't a thing to be found." He huffed at himself. "I wanna do all the shit you expect, but there's one thing that holds me back." He glanced over at J.D., then his eyes returned to hold mine. "Every time I see you with him? Cody, he pushes your buttons in the right way. When you're with J.D., you aren't some shy little girl hoping to be ignored. You're a bull rider. You're like this kickass woman strutting around in your black and pink gear, daring the boys to try something. You turn into a force of nature when you're around him, and you know what? I like it."
"Why?" I asked.
I heard what he was saying, but I couldn't believe it. All my life, I'd been the joke, the girl who had to beg for a date, who took herself to prom, and who was told that the only person who'd ever love me was my father. Shelby said the people back home were bullies, but I hadn't let them break me. At least, I hadn't thought I did. Right now, I wasn't so sure.
"Because I like you," Ty said, laying it right out there. "I like you enough to wait. I like you enough to be patient. And yeah, I like you enough that I'm ready and willing to fight for your right to do whatever you want to, even if that's not me. Cody, I..."
"No," J.D. told him. "You aren't jumping into some kind of insta-love with her. You may be a closet romantic, Ty, but if you try that shit right now, it means you like her because of what you want her to be, not because of who she is."
"Wasn't gonna go there," Ty snapped back. "I was going to say that I kinda wanna make up for how I treated all those girls in my past."
But that did it. Not Ty's answer, but rather the little bit in between. Those two bickering like an old married couple, as if they both knew the rules when no one else did. They didn't need to agree, yet they were still on the same page. That one little exchange made me feel like this was really happening, and not some perfectly planned ploy to chase me out of the PBR.
"Ok," I said suddenly.
Both of them turned to look at me. Their expressions said that hadn't been as bad as they'd expected. Or maybe that it had been too easy. Same thing, really.
"Look," I said, pushing my Dr. Pepper away to reach for a beer, "the truth is that I've had one boyfriend in my life. Y'all beat the crap out of him Wednesday night. I'm shit at dating. I'm worse at hooking up."
"You a virgin?" J.D. asked.
I groaned in frustration. "No, which is why Cole calls me a slut."
"I fucking hate that asshole," Ty grumbled. "We shoulda hit him harder."
"We could always go back," J.D. offered.
"Tempting," I said, "but no. Guys, the truth is that I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Ty, I like you. I kinda like J.D. too, but he's also a friend, and I've always heard that guys and girls as friends? Never works out."
"So let's figure it out together," Ty said. "Cody, I'd kinda like to be a friend too. See, I like talking to you as much as kissing on you."
I quickly glanced over at J.D. He just rolled his eyes at me. "I know you kiss on him, Cody. Ain't news. Hell, for all I care, you can go crawl in his lap right now and give me a show. I'm all kinky like that."
"Really?"
He gave me a look that said my question wasn't the smartest. "Yeah, really. Wait, you meant the kinky part, right?"
"No!" I cried. "I meant the kissing part."
"Oh, that. Yeah, well, I could double-dog dare ya if that makes it better." He flicked a finger over to Ty.
So, I decided to call his bluff. Hopping up, I took the step to Ty's chair and then stepped right into his lap, tucking one knee between his hip and the arm of the chair, then the other so I was sitting face to face with him. Ty's hands naturally lifted to my waist and something sparked in his eyes. Eyes that had just dropped to my lips.
"What is it with you after a shower?" he asked, pulling me a little closer.
Then he kissed me. The thing was, I kissed back, but I couldn't stop thinking about J.D. sitting right behind me. It made me even more aware of how close Ty's hands were to my breasts, and how he was slowly moving them higher. I could feel my heart beating so hard, caught between fear and excitement. I could taste the bitter tang of beer on Ty's tongue, smell the dust of the arena on his shirt, and that spicy scent of him beneath it all.
But he wouldn't let me get away with some timid, halfhearted kiss. No, he kissed me the way he had last weekend, leaning forward to crush my chest against his. My shirt suddenly felt a little too thin, the junction between my legs was throbbing in time with my pulse - so fast - and then a hand pushed my hair aside, and a second set of lips caressed my neck.
I moaned, leaning my head back to count hands without looking. That kiss on my neck got a little more intense with the flick of a tongue across my pulse, and the mouth that had been on my lips moved lower, down to my collarbone on the other side. Then I felt Ty reach out and push J.D. back.
"This isn't an orgy," he grumbled.
"Aw, but I know you like to share," J.D. teased before kissing the side of my face.
But those words yanked me back to reality hard. "What?!" I asked.
"Wasn't planning on telling her about that yet," Ty said. "Thanks, prick."
"And I wasn't planning to do anything more than kiss on her. Hell, Ty, if we're both gonna be her boyfriends, you think that's not gonna happen?"
"She's slept with one guy," Ty told him. "Pretty sure double penetration isn't in her lexicon."
"Big words," J.D. mocked. "Maybe you should ask her if she's into it, because ain't havin' done it don't mean the same as not wanting to."
"Stop!" I yelled, pushing myself off Ty's lap to look at J.D. "What the hell? Boyfriends? Double penetration? Orgies? Is that what you think I am?"
J.D. scooped an arm behind my back, pulling me closer even while keeping his weight off his bad leg. "I think you're a good girl because you haven't tried anything else. I also think that my rookie ain't scared of shit. I'm pretty sure that you're shocked because you got it in your little head somewhere that you're supposed to be. So yeah, let's start with the easy one, huh? Boyfriends. What else you gonna call us?"
"I can't have two boyfriends."
He cocked his head to the side and lifted a shoulder. "Kinda think you do right now. The two of us? We aren't chasing buckle bunnies tonight because of you. We aren't asking girls at the events to flash their tits before we ride. We're acting just like boyfriends, because that's what we really wanna be. So let's do it. Me, you, him. Like a timeshare, but on your terms, Cody."
I looked over at Ty who just lifted his hands and sighed a little too heavily. "I'm in if you are."
"I can't tell people I have two boyfriends!"
"Then don't," J.D. said. "Tell 'em we're friends. Use it like a code word. And hey, if you decide you want another boyfriend, I'll make sure Ty's ok with it. That's kinda what we're doing, making sure you get the chance to figure out that a threesome ain't something to hate, you know? But we're also trying to make sure that we're still in enough to be considered for it when you wanna try one."
"Just..." Ty made a waving and erasing gesture at J.D. "When you decide to go home with someone else, tell him, ok?"
"So you can't pull a stupid?" J.D. asked.
"So if it's someone I don't like I can take it out on your face," Ty corrected.
"I might hit back, man." J.D. lifted his chin, almost like a dare.
"I'm cool with that. Would keep me from doing something even more stupid."
"Deal." And J.D. looked down at me. "See, we're shit at this too. I still wanna do this, Cody. I wanna be your best friend. I also kinda wanna be your boyfriend, but I'm freaking the fuck out that I'm gonna fuck that up." He paused, looking up at the sky as he mouthed that last sentence to himself. "Yeah, I think that's enough fucks."
Ty eased himself out of his chair and right up against my back, pinning me between them. "I'm cool with two boyfriends. I'm willing to try an open relationship, friends, keeping it a secret, or any mix of those you want. Cody, I just wanna stay in the running." This time, he was the one moving to kiss my neck. "Now make out with him for a minute, because I need that shower."
And he just turned and walked away, making it clear that he was not upset at all about the idea of me kissing on J.D. All I could do was watch him cross the room with my mouth hanging open. I had a feeling this must be what it was like to win the lottery. This inability to process any coherent thoughts, disbelief in my own luck, and the logical part of my mind screaming that it had to be a trap. That there was no way in the world this would work out.
But so what if it didn't? I wasn't here to get a date. I wasn't riding bulls to impress the boys. Dad said I should do everything the boys did, and most of the time, they acted like hooking up was just something to do while waiting for their next ride. What was the worst thing that happened, I had to buy a bus ticket to the next town on the tour? I still had nine thousand dollars sitting in my bank, and as soon as I turned in my contract, I'd have even more. Next weekend, I'd be getting paid just to be there, and if I did well enough, I could buy my own damned truck and drive my own little ass around this tour.
So I smiled at J.D. and stepped back. "I'm not going to turn down an offer that good. So, J.D., wanna be one of my boyfriends?"
"Fuck yeah," he breathed, following me with his hand still around my back. "Honey..." He tugged me against his chest, pushed his good knee into the mattress, and we crashed down onto the bed together, making me aware that this room really wasn't that big. "Just don't forget that I wanna be your friend first."
And then his mouth met mine, and I forgot all about the stupid reasons I had to worry about this. All I could think about was getting his shirt off so I could touch him. When he pulled back to get his head free, I tossed his shirt at the couch, listening to the water running in the bathroom. I knew I should feel guilty about this. That was part of the intense rush of it. I also just wanted to kiss J.D. again and feel like the woman he made me when I stopped caring about what everyone else thought.
His body pinned me to the mattress, his mouth stole the breath from mine, and when I tried to grab for him, he pushed my hand down and laced his fingers through mine. I gasped and his mouth moved to my jaw, then my neck. He bit at the skin, growling like a man on the verge of becoming a beast, and it made me want to surrender completely.
"Fuck," he breathed beside my ear. "You are the most amazing woman in the world." Then he pushed his hips right there, proving he didn't need to work to find the sweet spot - but he winced, and I saw it.
"J.D.," I said, pushing him over so he had to flop onto his back. "How bad is your leg?"
"Ain't good," he admitted, tugging me closer. "But if I stop kissing you every time I'm hurt, then I'm not going to get a lot of this."
I snuggled up against his side and draped my leg over his thigh. He reached down to pull it a little higher, until the hard ridge in his pants was pressed against me. The whole time, his eyes watched me, like he was waiting to see when he'd gone too far.
"Talk to me, baby girl," he begged.
"About what?"
"Tell me what you think about this idea. Tell me I'm a fucking pervert. Tell me you like Ty more, because all the girls do. Tell me I'm too bad to even be in the running. I dunno, Cody. Just tell me the truth."
So I curled my face against his bare skin and looked toward the bathroom door to find Ty standing there in nothing but a towel. He shook his head, making it clear he didn't want to interrupt. That one little gesture made me feel brave enough to answer.
"I think that I'm in the PBR to ride bulls. I think that I'm a little overwhelmed, but damned if I don't hope this will work. I like both of you, ok?" Then I looked up at J.D. "You are my friend, and I thought you were nuts when we first met, but... I like your crazy, J.D. I also like Ty's way of keeping his shit together. I just... God, I hope this doesn't sound bad, but what you two are offering me? It kinda feels like that first time my daddy put me on a sheep and told me to hang on. Like I knew it would hurt so bad when I did fall off, but that wasn't the important thing. I just wanted that rush, even though I knew it wouldn't last, and, well..." I turned my eyes back to Ty, subtly making J.D. aware he was there. "I don't have a clue what I'm doing, which means this is gonna be a real bad wreck, but maybe I can just enjoy the ride?"
"Or maybe you'll figure out how to hold on," J.D. said softly. "Just because no one's done it before doesn't mean it can't be done. Kinda like being the first girl on the PBR's most elite circuit, right?"
"Right up until they start calling me a slut," I reminded them.
"Then Ty's your boyfriend in public," J.D. decided. "I'm your mentor. If you happen to spend the night with me, then it's just because I'm getting a cut from your sponsor when you show up, right? Or maybe you fought with him, or whatever other bullshit we need to tell them. We'll make this work, Cody."
"I promise," Ty said.
And the way they said that made me believe them. These two weren't friends. They didn't have a history of things like this, or even of working together. That we were all here, talking about this while I was lying draped across one man in the other's room?
Yeah, this was really fucking happening.