“Grayson,” I sigh and cup his cheek. “I love you too. I’ve been too scared to say it. In case this didn’t last.”
He touches his forehead to mine. “Ah, Serena. How could you not see my love for you? Feel it?”
It’s too sad to say out loud. But I know the answer.
Because I’ve never been loved before.
Chapter Sixteen
Grinder
It feels good to finally man the fuck up and tell Serena exactly what I feel. Even if I don’t want to admit it, part of me held the same fear. That she didn’t feel the same way I feel about her.
I keep stroking my hand over her thigh up to her hip. “I wish I could give you more, Serena. You deserve more than a man who can’t even spend a night away from home without getting in trouble.”
“Shh.” She presses her finger against my lips. “No one can choose a convenient time to fall in love. We’ll get through it.”
“I don’t want to make all the mistakes of my past your problem. You shouldn’t have to deal with any of it.”
“Our pasts shape us into who we are. Mine’s screwed me up in ways I’m still trying to unravel every day.”
“Don’t say that.” The things that have her messed up were done to her, not choices she made. I chose all of my bad decisions with open eyes.
“Gray, why’d you tell me you love me, if now you’re going to tell me all the reasons you shouldn’t?”
“I don’t think I deserve you.”
“You’ve been punished long enough.” She runs her fingers over my chest. “It’s time to start living again.”
Under the blanket, I slide my hand from her hip to her belly. She shifts her body to make room. “I want to create a life together.”
“Well, we did that.” She laughs softly and rests her hand over mine.
“You know what I mean. I want to buy you a nice house. Come home to you every night. Give our kids the things I never had.”
“I’d like that,” she whispers.
“Good. I was worried you were going to argue with me for a second.”
She presses her palm more firmly against my cheek. “Kiss me.”
But she’s already closing the distance between us, her lips crashing against mine. Like she’s taking a sledgehammer to whatever walls she was trying to put between us.
She shifts her body, tossing the blanket aside.
“I thought you were chilly?”
“Not anymore.” She lifts herself, planting her knees on either side of me and slowly lowering herself until she’s straddling my lap.
“Mmm, I like this view.” My hands slide from her hips to her rib cage, slowly pulling her shirt up.
Must be too slow. She grabs the hem and whips it over her head, tossing it aside.
“Aw, fuck,” I groan. “Even better view.” I cup her breasts, lazily flicking my thumbs against her nipples.
“No fair.” She pouts and drags my shirt up to my neck, exposing my chest and abdomen.
“You want this off?” I grip the back of my shirt, teasing her.
“Yes.” She rolls her hips, pressing herself against the fly of my jeans.
I flick the shirt off and rest my arms at my sides, letting her take a long look. Been a while since I enjoyed a woman’s appreciation, and I can’t get enough of Serena’s hungry eyes roaming over my skin.
She trails her fingers over the ink on my chest, then dives for my fly, tugging at my belt.
“Easy, buttercup. Slow down.”
“I want you inside me,” she says in a breathless rush. “Then we can go as slow as you want.”
I let out a deep groan of defeat. Who can say no to a demand like that? “Sounds like you have it all planned out.”
Her lips curl into that sweet little pout again. There isn’t a damn thing in this world I’d deny this woman when she looks at me like that. I lift up, freeing myself and she helps push my jeans over my hips.
“You takin’ those panties off or do I need to rip ‘em?” I nod to the skintight purple fabric blocking my path.
Bracing one hand on my shoulder and holding my gaze, she lifts herself and works her underwear over her hip. Impatient as fuck, I yank them lower and help her free one leg. The other will have to wait.
I slide my hand between her legs, finding her slick with desire. “Fuck, you’re drenched.”
“I…I know.” She bites her lip and I work my fingers back and forth. “I’ve been hot for you all day.”
“Why didn’t you say so earlier?” I twist my hand, slowly slipping a finger inside her. “I would’ve happily taken care of you.”
She inhales a long, shaky breath and watches me with dazed eyes. “I wanted to gather my strength.”
I’d laugh, but since I’m ready to pound her into the floor, it was a solid plan. “Good thinking.”