“Is there any news?” I call behind me. The gust is strong tonight, and the bare branches are whipping around like crazy.
It’s good that his coat sleeves are long enough to protect my hands and that the coat comes down to my calves. I must look like absolute shit, but I’m warm and the fresh air feels good as it burns my lungs. It distracts from the pinch in my chest and my eyes.
“Not really. Ryan said that things are quiet. The girl they found with Arabella doesn’t seem to know anything, and they can’t push her because…”
“She’s fragile. They can’t push her because of the baby,” I finish for him, remembering what Arabella mentioned when they were here.
It’s another stab to my heart the fact that they’re going easy on a stranger. They’re protecting her and her son when they’re trying to crucify me for something I haven’t a clue about.
“Yeah, they’re also trying to figure out who she is in all this. But the good news is that Freddie is putting all his crazy into looking for Lucy, so we’re good.”
“And Cassie?”
“She’s fine.” His voice does that thing where it mutes slightly when he’s hiding something. It’s actually not that perceptible, but we’ve spent enough time together now that I know all the small things about Casper.
“And?” I turn to face him as we reach the small clearing with the log we sit on and watch the sunset.
He waits for me to sit, and his pout hitches to the side like he’s debating whether he can tell me whatever it is he’s holding back. “And she’s okay.”
“What aren’t you telling me?” I focus on the tip of the clouded sun as it lingers on the edge of the horizon. The skin on my nape prickles as I look around, looking for Cameron. “I can feel him watching us.”
“Hmm…” Casper looks around, eyes narrowing in the direction we just came in. When he focuses back on me, he says, “She’s started planning the wedding.”
“Oh.” Everything hitches for a tick of time at his statement. My heart splinters some more, and tears threaten to spill. “But she and Leo only just got engaged. Why the rush?”
Shrugging, he gently squeezes my shoulder, pulling me closer to him. His chin rests on the top of my head, and normally I love it. I love all the ways he touches me. There’s nothing I want more than for him to keep touching me, but right now…I’m being suffocated by all the complications we’re living.
“Emily probably pushed them to do it,” I say out loud to myself more than anything.
While I blink my eyes dry, the sun disappears completely. All that’s left are misty clouds and a darkening sky.
“Probably,” he says, cupping my face to him, stroking my cheek with his thumb. “Either way, I promise you won’t miss it, all right?”
The promise is sincere, but we both know it’s not one he can truly make. Shrugging, I hug my belly. It’s odd how the baby knows when he’s close. It’s kind of comforting that there’s a bond between them already. It makes the prospect of anything happening to me less daunting.
The only thing that bothers me about leaving them is doing so without knowing what we are. Not knowing if he’ll remember me forever, enough to make sure that she’ll know me even when I’m gone.
Hand smoothing down my back, he asks, “Want to go back?”
The wind is picking up some more, and the sea is getting rough. Last time we stayed out into the storm, he had to practically carry me back to the house. So, I nod even though the storm brewing on the horizon dulls the one inside me.
“I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”
“Yeah, I could eat.” I take his hand as he leads me back down the hill. “I’ve left the sauce on the stove, so all we have to do is the pasta.”
“After this I don’t think I’ll be able to eat spaghetti again.”
“Ugh, sorry…I guess you were right, I’m not really a cook.”
Casper laughs like it’s an understatement or something. Still, he squeezes my hand tighter before wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me close.
“But to be fair to me, you’re not exactly the best shopper either. I’ve made do with what you’ve brought back from the village.”
“Tell me what you want me to get and I’ll get it.”
“Or you could let me come with you? Venture into civilisation…”
Casper stops and turns to me, his eyes scrunched together and fierce even in the semi-darkness. “It’s far too risky, and you’re far too pregnant to be running around if anything goes down.”