So much had changed between them since they’d come to Atlanta. His partner was a complex contraption of suppressed emotions, a product of the United States government. A dormant mountain filled with fear, disgust, pain, desire, needs... but most of all, rage and anger. He didn’t suppose the biologist had factored in what would happen if a powerful catalyst blew the cap off that volcano, and all of those fucking emotions overcame their highly trained killer at once.
How could that man possibly be contained?
He couldn’t.
And Meridian could see it in Ex’s gray eyes that he knew he couldn’t either—and it was terrifying him. Hell, it was terrifying Meridian, and that wasn’t easy. However, he knew what his partner was capable of—the brutality and violence he could inflict. And that was when he was under command and held in check by their handler. Meridian would need to make sure Ex stayed in control, his control. If Ex still couldn’t ask for what he knew he needed, then Meridian would just have to give it to him.
“Mere,” Ex practically groaned his name, his mask removed.
The thought of Ex suffering so much on the inside had Meridian acting. He leaned in the final couple of inches separating them. Their noses touched first and Meridian nudged him gently to the side and pressed against his cheek. Ex did a lousy job controlling himself as he began to pant along Meridian’s jaw.
They stood that way for a moment. Their hands at their sides, their mouths breathing against one another’s. Ex’s skin was smoother than his own bristly stubble. He leaned in closer and Ex gasped into his mouth. Meridian closed his eyes and let himself have this. They might’ve gone another eight years before breaking down and acting on the intensity that’d always radiated between them, but never as strong and necessary as it felt right then. He never knew when life would blow their world apart at the seams. Chaos was as random and struck as fast as lightning. That was what was happening between them.
It took him a while, but he just barely pressed his lips to the corner of Ex’s mouth. The bit of fuzz along his upper lip tickled him, stimulating him even more. Meridian looked down and was happy to find Ex’s eyes open, but hooded, staring up at him through those light-colored lashes. He felt his cock jerk from the visual and hurried to stifle it.
“No shields. No hiding, Mere. Okay?” Ex said into his mouth, his lips parted and moist from where he’d licked them.
Shit. Meridian wasn’t trying to hide from him. Ex was probably feeling like a skinned sheep and it wasn’t right for Meridian to show off as if he was still functioning as they’d been designed to when he wasn’t. Meridian may not have any family left to mourn or care for, but he had Ex and he was done denying that the man kissing him wasn’t everything he had in the world.
Meridian cupped Ex’s jaw, liking how his hand—his four fingers—was able to cover most of his face. He lifted his partner’s head until his lips were aligned with his and kissed him with full, unguarded passion. Their hands naturally came together at their sides. Meridian linked their fingers and squeezed, not believing this was happening. Ex’s lips were slack as if he was too overwhelmed to participate. The way Ex’s chest pounded against his told Meridian all he needed to know, as he took control.
Ex moaned when Meridian slid his tongue past his lips. He didn’t delve in and be greedy like he wanted. Ex wasn’t some horny mark he was working. Instead, he went slow so he could enjoy him and let his mouth glide along Ex’s in a calming way, trying to get him to relax into him. But it was him who tensed when Ex’s arm eased around his waist, brushing the handle of his Smith and Wesson. Shit. Meridian clenched his teeth when he felt his dick pulse as if he was a virgin who’d never been kissed.
“I know. This is crazy,” Ex breathed against his lips.
Meridian could feel that Ex was just as solid as him below his belt. Damn, he wanted more. Ex’s lips were a lot softer than he’d imagined and just as cool as the rest of him, but inside his mouth was warmth.
“God, Mere. What are we doing?”
Meridian unlinked his hand and cupped the other side of Ex’s face. The side with the beautiful combat scar. “I don’t know. I just know it’s wrong.”
Ex frowned but he didn’t let him go. He clutched him even tighter and growled, “Why?”
Meridian exhaled and rested his forehead against Ex’s. He brushed his fingertips along his bottom lip, feeling as if he’d go insane if he didn’t have another taste right then. Yeah. This was so damn wrong. “Because it feels too fucking good for this to be right.”