Meridian didn’t answer his question and instead asked, “Is there something I can help you with?”
“Yeah. You can answer my question.” Ex didn’t turn around. He continued to survey what’d been deemed Meridian’s personal space while they were there, allowing himself to really see his partner like this for the first time.
“Ladies have nothing to do with why I keep buying a two thousand dollar bottle of cologne.”
Ex didn’t try to shield the slight tremor flitting down his back. He set Meridian’s brush back next to his comb and asked, “Then why do you?”
“Are you sure you’re ready to hear my answer?” Meridian rumbled from close behind him.
Ex could smell that woodsy fragrance that always lingered wherever Meridian went, a hint of those sweet, black cigarettes, but he also smelled car oil. “Where have you been?” Ex asked.
“The clutch is fixed in your car.”
Ex spun around. His breath catching, “You fixed it? That’s what you’ve been doing out there? It’s fucking freezing.” He took in Meridian’s stain-smudged jeans and his dingy long john shirt. His hands were covered in filth and there were even a few splotches of grease on his handsome face. Ex knew he was playing with fire, but he was already burning up, what was the worst he could do?
He’d always been so careful with restraining his emotions, his feelings, his urges for men in general that it felt almost dangerous to let this part of himself free after all this time. But Ex could trust Meridian, he knew he could. One thing they were good at was reading each other, and there’d been no mistaking how hot and hard his partner had been the other night when he was moving on top of him... and licking him. There was no mistaking the way Meridian was looking at him now. If there was one thing he could recognize in his partner—even though his face remained a mask of intimidating hardness—it was when he was excited.
“Yeah. It wasn’t that hard. There’s nothing a man can’t fix if he has YouTube,” Meridian said, inching past Ex to get to his sink. He didn’t miss the way Meridian brushed his hard chest along his back when he passed. As Meridian scrubbed his hands he watched Ex in the large oval mirror in front of them. Those eyes were so compelling and captivating that Ex’s body started to vibrate from pent-up resistance—years of withholding and denying himself for the good of his country. But what the fuck did America care if he was getting any or not? As long as he did his damn job—like Lieutenant Godfrey and his husband.
Ex stood in the doorway with his heart in his throat as he watched Meridian through new, uncensored eyes. And damn, he liked what he saw. He liked it all. Liked how deadly he was. Liked who and what they were when they were together. He liked that there was no one he trusted more than the man standing in front of him. He liked that Meridian had killed for him, many times. He’d also saved him, cared for him when he was wounded. He’d... he’d even brought him back from the dead. Ex’s cold skin suddenly began to feel even colder. What is this?
Meridian dried his face and hands then replaced the small towel on the rack. He walked towards him and Ex didn’t retreat... not this time. Meridian stopped when he was in front of him, and Ex had to tilt his head back slightly to maintain eye contact.
“If you’re waiting for an answer to your question, then I’ll tell you since it’s not already obvious.” Meridian stared at Ex’s mouth while he spoke. “I wear that fragrance because it’s the only one you respond to.”
Ex frowned, feeling his cheeks heat, “I don’t.”
“Oh, you definitely do,” Meridian said, his expression serious. And so fine. “When I first wore it around you, you looked at me almost offensively. The next time, I wore it, you tried to keep some distance between us the entire day. But your fight didn’t last long, especially since I wouldn’t stop spraying it on every chance I got. After that it was pretty hard to miss the way you reacted to it.”
Ex wondered if all that was true. He guessed it had to be.
“Why’d you really come in here?” Meridian asked, still standing close enough that his warm breath caressed his cheek.
“I was...” I was hurting... and I needed to... I went looking for you to make it go away.
“You were what?” Meridian whispered roughly.
“I don’t know.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Mere.” Ex tensed.
“Just ask me, Xavier... and I’ll give you whatever you need. You know that.”
Meridian suspected Ex would’ve been up and pacing again by now since it’d been a few hours since he’d worked on the car. Meridian hadn’t wanted to leave Ex alone for long. When he went to search for him he’d been surprised to find Ex in his bathroom... touching his things.