“Back off pretty boy. You and your perfect life. Life is a competition, there is not enough meat to go round,” Jeff said pushing into Jared.
“Evading questions as usual. Since when have you started hiding stuff from me? We are twins remember? We used to be able to read each other’s minds,” Jared said, backing off a little.
“So read my mind now.” He looked right in his brother’s eyes and waited. “Yeah, that is little kid stuff, we are men now and all bets are off.”
“What’s that supposed to mean? We are still brothers. And since when have you ever wanted anything I have?” Jared asked, sounding angry again.
“Since…since,” Jeff began but Suzie cut him off. She had heard enough.
“Hey,” she said, touching Jared’s arm. “Let’s go for a walk.”
Both brothers stopped and looked at her. While Jared leaned down to kiss her cheek and agree, she saw Jeff’s eyes, hungry, angry, wanting. She bit her lip and turned and walked away with Jared. Silently they walked hand in hand down the path to the spot where Jared had taken her previously, their special spot. She felt sick again but knew she had to put an end to this, or at least try. The problem was she had no idea what to say. When they reached the spot, they sat down. Jared spoke for a while about his brother and how he was worried something was going on with Jeff. Suzie let him speak, not giving any feedback and then they sat quietly for a time.
“I have something I have to tell you,” Suzie started.
“I thought you wanted to wait until the drive home,” Jared said.
“Maybe I should, but it cannot wait anymore. I don’t want to lie to you,” Suzie said.
“Ok, go for it,” Jared said, sounding nervous.
“I don’t know how,” Suzie said. When Jared did not move, she put her hand on his and took a breath. “First, I am sorry things seem strange between us. I never meant for any of this to happen.”
“Any of what to happen?” Jared asked, getting agitated. Suzie started mumbling again and Jared stopped her. “Just say it.”
“Ok. I met someone. It wasn’t intentional, but something happened and I didn’t know how to tell you because I still want you,” Suzie said, knowing it had only just begun.
Jared pulled his hand away and turned to look at her. “What do you mean you met someone? What happened? What aren’t you telling me?”
“He kind of surprised me. It wasn’t planned. But when he kissed me, I let him and then I kissed him and I am sorry,” Suzie said, praying the questions would stop.
“WHAT! WHEN? It was the night of the fire wasn’t it? And did you see him again after that?” Jared stood up and faced her, his face hurt and confused.
“Yes,” Suzie said softly.
“K, I don’t want to know anymore,” Jared said sadly.
“I’m sorry,” Suzie said. “Can we start over?”
“Do you want to, or do you want the other guy?” Jared asked. Then said, “Never mind I don’t want you to answer that question.”
“I am here,” Suzie said and wrapped her arms around him trying to shelter him from more hurt.
“Okay,” he said and let her hug him but did not return the hug. “Do you think you could find your way back yourself? I would like to be alone for a while.”
Suzie nodded and kissed him on the cheek. She walked back to the cabin slowly, unsure what to do. She felt sad and elated at the same time. Sure she had hurt Jared but not as much as if he found out the whole truth and now he wouldn’t have to. Jared would either decide to start over with her or be done but either way it would be on his terms, not by being betrayed by his brother. Jeff, she had momentarily forgotten about him. He had been so upset at supper; she should go and tell him what she had told Jared so that he would not spoil her story. Picking up the pace she decided to stop at the studio and talk with him before Jared came back.
Knocking on the door of the studio it was dark and Suzie was worried Jeff had left. No one answered the door so she stepped inside, calling out into the darkness. Jeff turned a light on and she could see him, wearing nothing but jeans as usual. He was painting, in the dark apparently and it was a new canvas, this one dark with anger. It spoke of passion and heartbreak and pain and his feverish painting of it showed in his paint covered hands and arms. Still saying nothing he went to the sink to wash them.
“Does Jared know you are here?” he asked.
“No,” she replied. “He asked to be alone.”
“You told him about us?” Jeff asked.
“No, but I told him I met someone else,” Suzie said.
“Just met?” Jeff said with emphasis on what she didn’t say.