He screamed in pain.
All I could think was one swift kick to my gut and it would all be over. But Joshua wouldn’t be able to do that now. He couldn’t even walk, let alone put all of his weight on that leg in order to kick me. The handle stuck out like a deformed tree branch. I shuddered as I thought of the blade cutting through the skin and muscles from the force of my swing.
“You bitch!” he growled.
Just as he was about to pounce, a light popped on behind him from the kitchen. It had been on one of my dad’s many timers. Random rooms were illuminated and then darkened as timers went on and off making it look like someone was indeed home.
Startled Joshua turned on his heel and clumsily tumbled to the left trying to hide from view. It was just enough time for me to get to my feet and make a dash for the kitchen.
The back door had a dead bolt, a small button lock on the knob and a chain. All of them were engaged. All I needed were a couple of seconds and I’d have them undone and the door open. If nothing else I could scream quickly. Fire! They always say to yell fire instead of help. It gets people worried about themselves and so they are more likely to make that phone call to 9-1-1.
Running past him and into the kitchen I reached for the door and snapped the deadbolt to the right. I slid the chain along slot. It stuck for a split second before yanked it out of the chamber. I felt my hand on the knob turning it to the left to pop the lock when suddenly I felt my head yanked backwards by my hair.
“I don’t think so!” Joshua yelled. “No, you won’t be going anywhere. Not for a while.” He pulled me up against him and wrapped his arm around my middle. I squirmed and writhed trying to get his arm up or down, anywhere that wasn’t where the baby might be. “We’re going to have some fun, tonight, Natasha. Fun like we used to have. But first, there are a few things I want to know.”
Joshua’s breath was hot and stale against my face. His body radiated heat like from a fever and I could smelt he sour scent of body odor indicating it had been a few days since he showered. That scared me.
I had read somewhere that a sign of a severe mental problem was discontinuing a hygienic routine. If you suddenly don’t feel like bathing because, oh I don’t know, you feel there is no point, you don’t care what happens to yourself or maybe, just maybe you are too busy stalking your current obsession to take the time to brush your teeth or wipe after going to the bathroom then it was a pretty safe bet you were losing your marbles. And this dirty smell was a far cry from the spicy cologne that had seemed so intoxicating when we had first met.
Dragging me over to the kitchen table, Joshua slammed me down into one of the chairs so hard my teeth rattled in my head. Again, I grabbed my stomach.
“If you’re going to kill me then just do it and get it over with.” I said, surprised my voice wasn’t shaking more.
“I think I’ve got a good bit of time yet for you to tell me.”
“Tell you what?”
“To tell me what my brother was like in bed.”
My jaw had to hit the ground. I sat there dumbfounded. What kind of a sick mind would want to know this about his brother?
“You’re disgusting.” I said, unaware that my body was instinctively pulling back from Joshua.
“I’m disgusting? You were the one serving up the sloppy seconds, sweetheart. You are the only woman on the planet who knows what it is like to be with both of us. And I want to know the details. I want to know how he managed to satisfy someone like you.”
I couldn’t think of a thing to say. My whole mind had gone blank.
“I’ll tell you what, Natasha. Why not just start from the beginning. Tell me about the first time you let my brother take you. You were still sleeping with me, I presume. Tell me what it was that he said that got your panties off.”
The humiliation of Joshua’s line of questioning swept completely over me. My eyes began to fill with tears no matter how hard I bit my tongue, trying to stop them. What should I do? Was there anything that would buy me some time? Was there anything that would buy me a chance to get away, for my baby and me to get away?
“You’re
sick, Joshua. Don’t you know that?” I said quietly. “You don’t have to be like this. Marty can help you. You aren’t all alone. Hell, I’ll help you but you’ve got to let me go. You’ve got to…”
“Ha! That is hilarious, Natasha! You’re a riot!” His eyes had gone black with rage. Behind them was a wild beast, a devil that fed off the fear and the desperation that I was emitting. This was the kind of evil that lurked in the jungle with a machete in its hand. This was the kind of evil that drifted from state to state. This was the kind of evil that slipped into open windows of middle class homes. Except this evil wore $1500 dollar suits and drove fancy sports cars. This kind of evil would never suffer for what he did to me or anyone else. Only someone from that same environment could do battle with this kind of demon. And just then I thought I heard sirens in the distance. How I prayed they were for me.
“Tell me, Nat, did he whisper sweet words in your ear as he slipped his hand under your shirt? Or did my brother talk dirty to get your engine purring? Was he quick or slow? Come on, Natasha. I need to know this.” He was beginning to sound desperate. He leaned down in my face. “You better start talking.” The slap upside my head made me fall forward. Then he grabbed my hair again and shook it hard.
“Talk, Natasha!” he screamed in my face. Nothing would come. Even if I wanted to tell him everything I couldn’t form a word. As if he didn’t believe the terror in my eyes Joshua stood up, pulled his hand back and punched me in the face.
It is true that stars circle your head when you get hit hard enough. I saw them. They were bright white stars and I was sure that my cheek and eye had swollen up to the size of a football within seconds.
The sirens were getting closer. Were they for me? I watched in the front room to see if the lights shined through and I don’t know for certain I saw anything but I wanted to make sure Joshua didn’t have a chance to get away.
“You’re crazy. You’re so crazy with jealousy over your brother it is laughable!” I said both hands circling my belly as I pushed myself back from him. He growled with fury.
In one sudden move I bolted for the other side of the kitchen only to have Joshua grab my arm and fling me back, slamming me into the door I had almost gotten out of.