Luci Emery tagged Addison Laing in a status.
I nearly drop my phone in shock. It’s almost as if Luci can see me looking at her page and this is her way of reminding me to keep the hell away. Addie’s best friend never took much of a shine to me and I don’t suppose that has changed now. I’m sure she still despises me.
Curiosity gets the better of me. I need to see the status. It doesn’t matter how much Luci hates me or even that she’s onto me. I just need to know what the hell is going on with Addie.
‘What a crazy day! Things are looking up @ Hayley Spraggon’s Dating Agency - with Addison Laing’
“A dating agency?” I exclaim in shock. “For who? For Luci or Addie? Who is dating?”
My heart races at the speed of light, it pounds heavily in my throat, I can barely breathe under the pressure of it. The idea of Addie with anyone is killing me, and actively looking for someone is worse. I can’t stand it. I want to scream. The moment that I know she’s moved on is the second that everything is lost.
I tug my fingers through my hair and pace the room, the urge to get out from these four walls is now crushing me. Killing me. I need to do something, to take action, to cling on to this feeling that’s nothing like the numbness I’ve been feeling for as long as I can remember. I don’t know what yet, but there has to be something that I can do, isn’t there?
Panic almost consumes me; I haven’t ever felt so deeply before. This is sheer, it’s intense, it’s boundless. I clutch my stomach, then my head, trying to locate the source of the anxiety to shut it off.
I stare at the status again, then at Addie’s face, and all I want to do is to be by her side. That would feel so much better than this, I know it. I just know that any sort of life with her would be more fulfilling than being a famous rock star where everyone knows my fucking name.
But there isn’t any way to get back to her. Is there?
Is there?
3
ADDISON
“Hayley Spraggon’s Dating Agency,” I say with a shaky voice. “Really, Luci? Do I have to do this?”
I stare up at the bright white building with lights shining off it, inviting people inside, a strong sense of intimidation overcoming me. I don’t belong here, this isn’t right. This is a place for people actively looking for love, those who are ready for it, not messy people like me who don’t know what they want. Or perhaps I do know, but it’s something I shouldn’t want and that I definitely cannot have.
“Come on.” Luci grabs onto my arm and laughs at my fear. “Let’s go in. You’ll love this.”
I try to resist but even my body is against me. It’s so conditioned to fall in line with whatever Luci tells me to do because it knows that she’s bold where I’m not. She makes me be the person who I want to be… usually. Not now though, this is the opposite to what I want. I don’t want to date anyone.
She pulls me inside the office and makes me take my seat in the reception area. I think Luci can tell that I’m a flight risk because she heads over to the reception desk and signs me in. Internally, I curse her, I want to wring her neck and make her see sense, but outwardly I’m as cool and collected as can be.
Luckily, my job needs me to be calm under pressure. I’m used to this. Well, not this but pressure.
I twist my fingers around and around as Luci takes her seat. She sits so close to me I know that she’ll grab me if I chose to run. Not that I will. I’m a grown ass woman, I’m not actually about to race out of here… mostly because I have high heels on and I don’t think I’d get that far, but still.
“It’s going to be fine,” Luci hisses to me. “Stop worrying, Addison. It’ll be alright, I’m here for you.”
I smile thinly at her, trying to display some sort of confidence, but it doesn’t really play out. Luci can see right through me. She’s such an awesome, caring friend, I don’t know where I’d be without her…
“What the hell is that?” I demand, grabbing her cell phone from her. “Is that… oh my god: ‘What a crazy day! Things are lookin
g up @ Hayley Spraggon’s Dating Agency - with Addison Laing’. What is that?”
“What?” Luci shrugs as if she doesn’t get what she’s done wrong.
“Delete it! Delete it now. I don’t want people to know what I’m doing.”
“Why not? What does it matter? Everyone dates one way or another.”
“But they don’t make it obvious to the world,” I exclaim.
“They do. Everyone is doing it, no one cares, honestly.”
I roll my eyes and shake my head. “Please, Luci, delete it, this is hard enough.”