“I…want Jesse to go away,” he admits. “But! I wouldn’t kill anyone. And I wouldn’t have him killed, either.”
His expression is earnest. It’s exactly as Jacqui said. Kyle doesn’t care what happens to Jesse. But he also wouldn’t organize something like that.
“Grant wouldn’t have repeated what I said,” Kyle continues when I don’t say anything. “He would have just told the guys to keep a look out for Jesse, maybe rough him up a little with some threats. Nothing else. I swear.”
Do I believe him? I want to.
“Why didn’t you tell me this yesterday?” I demand.
Even as the words exit my mouth, I know I’m being stupid. Of course he didn’t explain. I didn’t give him much chance to.
“Sorry,” Kyle says anyway with a sigh. “My friend Ethan… He told me I was a fucking idiot, that I should have chosen my words more carefully and then not messed up when I tried to explain. All I did was make it worse.”
Well, admittedly, all he managed to do when he attempted to explain was make me angrier and more liable to believe that he would conspire to commit murder. But…
“It’s partly my fault too,” I admit. “Jacqui ran me over the coals, too. She said I was being an idiot, even if she understood why I was angry, and that I should at least have let you explain before kicking you out. Also…” I sigh. “I’m sorry I said I misjudged you. I shouldn’t have been judging you at all. How can I judge you when I don’t even really know you?”
Kyle winces. “Yeah, there’s that, too. I’m not surprised you jumped to conclusions. I’m just a stranger, after all.”
“Well…maybe not a complete stranger,” I snort.
We’ve slept together three times by now. One of us should have behaved like an adult and said something instead of just going with the flow. I had planned on talking to Kyle on Tuesday night, when we organized our move date, but then all this happened.
And I know Kyle wanted to talk to me, too. He wanted to know how I was feeling after the photos at my door on Saturday morning. He wanted to talk before I dragged him into sex, but then we collapsed and watched movies for the rest of the day, ignoring the world, instead.
Now, however, it’s just awkward. How do you say to someone that you’ve had sex with three times that you want to go out on a date and get to know them? That’s what should have happened first.
“We really did things in the wrong order, didn’t we?” I ask.
“Yeah, but that night was just a fluke,” Kyle says, shaking his head. “A one-night-stand. I left your apartment on Thursday morning thinking we’d never meet again.”
“Then you knocked on my door at two-thirty, demanding that I let you protect me from Jesse,” I say dryly. “After that, you never left.”
Kyle makes a face. “Maybe I really did become a stalker.”
“The last few nights certainly suggest you have,” I joke.
We laugh. It’s tentative, but we’re smiling at each other, and something warm blooms in my chest. I didn’t realize that I actually missed Kyle since yesterday. His absence had left an oddly large hole in my life, and I find myself relaxing now that we’re filling it back in.
“I guess we were both idiots,” I say. “Good thing we both had friends to knock our heads together.”
Kyle chuckles. “I had fun trying to explain that one with Ethan’s daughter in the room, trying to take part in the conversation. Lily was horrified to hear that I might get the police called on me, and she automatically thought it was my fault.”
I snort. “I would have loved to see that. How old is Lily?”
His smile turns fond. “She’s ten, now. Her mother ran off not longer after she was born. Ethan has his hands full with her; she’s always propositioning other women for him because she wants a new mother. Of course, both she and Ethan are completely blind to the woman who stands beside them, wanting desperately to be part of their family.” He laughs. “Like father, like daughter, I guess.”
His face is lit up and his smile is soft. He really loves these people, whoever they are. I feel a little jealous of the people that can put that sort of smile on his face.
“I’d love to meet them all,” I say.
“I’ll take you around one day,” he promises. “Lily demanded to meet you, anyway, when Ethan told her you were my girlfriend.” He coughs, suddenly awkward. “Though, I know you’re not. I told Ethan off for that.”
I blink and smile. But my chest clenches at his denial. He’s right, we’re not actually in a relationship with each other. All we’ve done is have sex.
And cuddled together to watch movies, my mind argues. And didn’t you organize to watch a movie last night? That would definitely have counted as a date!
“I could be.”