He shuts the water off and shakes his head, as if to expel memories out of his mind. “It’s just… the way you looked at me earlier. The fear in your eyes. I…”
“I promise I wasn’t afraid of you.” I step closer. “If anything, I was afraid for Caleb. I knew what you could do to him, and he needs his legs. He’s a soccer player.”
He releases a weak laugh and glances down at his feet.
“I’m sorry I freaked out. I get it. It was before me. You were best friends, and you had a thing for him. It happens. I just—”
“No, I didn’t. I didn’t have a thing for him. That’s exactly the problem.” I step forward. “God, there’s so much you don’t know.”
He cocks an eyebrow. “Then tell me.”
I oblige and tell him everything. From beginning to end. I tell him I burst out crying after Caleb and I slept together. That I panicked and shut down, telling him to get out and destroying what was left of our friendship in the process. I explain that the next day, Caleb came over begging for us to talk, and I told him the truth: that I didn’t feel that way about him. I confessed to being a sad mess and doing this for all the wrong reasons. He didn’t take it well, as one can understand, and left. We never spoke again after that. Not once during the months leading up to my departure for Florida. This is how Jaden knew we had a fight; he never found out exactly what happened but told me he?
??d always suspected Caleb had feelings for me.
Haze is at a loss for words, his eyes boring into mine.
“And you’re right. It was before you. Before I met you, and I fell in love with your stupid jokes, perfect smiles and—”
He cuts me off. “I love you.”
Relief pours over me.
“I love you so much, Winter, too much, and it scares the shit out of me because I’m going to fuck it up somehow. I know I am. I’m going to ruin it by being…” He exhales. “Me.”
“You won’t ruin it.”
He scoffs. “In case you couldn’t tell, I’m a fucking mess.”
I press my forehead to his.
“In case you couldn’t tell, I am, too.”
We laugh quietly, forehead to forehead, for a short moment I wish could last forever.
“You’re not going to ruin us,” I repeat.
“Yes, I am.” A hint of annoyance drips from his voice. The way he says it—like it’s inevitable and there’s absolutely no doubt in his mind—throws me off. “Eventually,” he retracts himself. “Trust me, I’ve spent my entire life fucking up everything that matters.”
“So what? You can change that. What you do next is up to you. You’re not your past.”
“How can you be so sure?” he argues.
“Because past you didn’t have me.”
He chews on his bottom lip as an answer. I cup his face with both hands so that our eyes lock. “I’m going to be there to keep you from going off the rails every step of the way. Every time you get too close, I’ll bring you back. I’m always going to be there, Haze. If you just let me.”
Silence ensues. He holds my gaze for a few seconds. Then he says it.
“I’m going to marry you.”
My heart stops.
I drop my hands to my side. “W-What?”
The look on my face must be something because he laughs the next second.
“Relax, Winter, this isn’t a proposal. I’m just telling you. Someday, I’m going to marry you.”