None of it is registering.
Haze is the reason my father almost died?
“They told me to stay away from you, and as you can tell from what happened last night…” He chews on his lip. “I failed.”
By the time he finishes his story, I’m barely holding it together. That’s why he did all this. He had no choice but to leave me. I want to burst into tears because what happened to my father has something to do with Haze, and I hate that this link even exists. I don’t want to see my father suffer and think of my boyfriend.
“I’m so, so sorry. My hands were tied. I thought I was keeping you safe. Then it just… spiraled out of control.”
I bury my face in his neck and inhale his scent.
God, we’re so broken.
We’re a goddamn tragedy.
“I just want you to know, I was coming back home to you that night.” I know exactly what he’s referring to. The day where I waited for him for hours. “They called and threatened to hurt you, and I lost it. I was an idiot for thinking I could keep you in the dark.”
The obvious question catches up to me. “Wait? How did you get out of it? You’re here now and you just told me everything so… is it over?”
“Yeah. It’s over.” He runs a hand through my hair and leans in to kiss my cheek. “They gave me a job tonight. I had to do this one huge thing for them to let me out of this shit deal. I had to do this so that I could be with you again.”
“How bad was it?” I wince.
He draws a sigh, “Listen, all you need to know is that it was bad. Really bad.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing. I was about to do it. But Tanner called.”
My mouth drops. “Tanner? As in your brother?”
Way to go, Captain Obvious.
“I know, I couldn’t believe it either. He told me he was sorry for everything. That he’d handled it. He said that I could go home to you.”
I’m surprised. “No strings attached?”
“None. He said he promised them something. Something big, I just don’t know what. A shit ton of money is my guess,” he says softly. “Do you hate me?”
His eyes are red, crippled by guilt.
“For what happened to your dad?”
I know I have to think of it from his perspective. They were basically holding him at gunpoint. Come to think of it, I’m actually relieved he did all this because he had to. Not because he wanted to. But I can’t help thinking that his hunt for his sister’s killer is the reason for all of this.
The source of all our problems.
If he hadn’t been looking for Marcus, he wouldn’t have lied, he wouldn’t have had to pretend to cheat, and my father would’ve never been in a coma. I’ll have to ask him the dreadful question soon.
Are you going to keep looking for him?
I’ve tried to accept it. I did everything I could to support his need for revenge because he lost his baby sister. He had to watch her die, when he was nothing but a kid himself. But I want him to stop looking. I can’t live like this, wondering if he’s going to make it home or who’s going to get caught in the crossfire next. Not after I almost lost my only parent. He escaped this time, because he got lucky, but his brother won’t always be there to save his ass. We don’t speak for a few minutes, lost in each other’s arms. It’s inevitable. I need to know what his plans are. But not now. Right now, we’re happy. I just want one night.
One night before I ask him.
29
Back Together