“Now that I think about it, Dad, you were oddly specific about wanting to come here after the farmers’ market,” Jeremy said. He grinned down at me.
I squeaked, but thankfully it was lost in the din around us.
“Oh, pishposh,” Robert said. “I’ve always heard about this place and wanted to try it. Why, I barely even remember the telephone conversation from only hours ago with Charlie when he said he was going to invite Corey here for lunch. You know how it is. The older you get, the more your mind slips.”
I thought about going for my phone and sending out a mass text of CODE ORANGE BANANA!!!!!!! but I couldn’t figure out a way to do it without looking like I was panicking.
Jeremy bumped his shoulder against his father’s. “Right. Your recall is better than mine, so I’m not going to believe that.”
“That would be your choice, Jeremy,” Robert said, sounding gleeful. “Scoot over, Charlie. My dogs are barking, and I need to give them a rest.”
“Maybe we should ask them first instead of just inviting ourselves to their—”
“We don’t mind,” Charlie said quickly, shoving over closer to the wall to make room for Robert. “Do we, Corey?” His tone made it abundantly clear that no, we absolutely did not mind.
“Uhh,” I said.
Robert sat down with a huff, setting his cane against the side of the booth. He patted the top of Charlie’s hand, and then, as if his sole purpose was to cause the death of me, he leaned over and kissed Charlie’s cheek.
All the blood that had previously left Charlie’s face came rushing back, and Charlie was now blushing.
This was at once the greatest and most terrible thing that had ever happened to me. It was a conundrum I was not prepared to navigate.
“You okay with this?” Jeremy asked me quietly. He leaned over, the collar of his tank top hanging loosely around his neck. I had to tear my gaze away because chest hair and nipples. “He can be a little pushy.”
“Uhh,” I said again.
“Move over, kiddo,” Charlie said. “Don’t be rude. And of course we’re okay with you being here. The more the merrier.”
“That’s much better,” Robert said. “After all, this wasn’t planned in the slightest.”
I didn’t know how to relay in code to Charlie that his super-cute boyfriend was quite possibly evil without giving anything away.
I did the only thing I could.
(Seeing as how the salt and pepper shakers were out of reach.)
I moved over.
So much so that I was practically plastered against the wall.
And it was only then I realized I was trapped.
Jeremy sighed and sat down next to me, and for a brief moment, our calves bumped together, his leg hair brushing against my smooth skin. I coughed roughly as he settled.
He reached over and slapped a hand against my back. “All right?”
“Sorry,” I gasped, eyes watering. “That went down the wrong tube.”
“You weren’t drinking anything,” Charlie pointed out helpfully.
I didn’t know how to relay in code to Charlie that he was also quite possibly evil. “There we are!” Sally exclaimed as she came back to the table. “Just look at this table full of handsome men. Why, this just might be the highlight of my day.” She handed a menu to Robert and another to Jeremy. “We love our Charlie here. It’s usually just him dining, but I think this is better.”
“That’s enough, Sally,” Charlie warned.
She seemed immune to him. “So you say. But since you are now—how do the kids say it these days? Off the market? Going steady?” She shook her head. “Oh, listen to me, going on like I know what I’m talking about. Just hearing you refer to him as your gentleman makes me happy.”
“Is that right?” Robert asked Charlie. “Your gentleman, is it?”