“I was helping out at the hospital.”
“And the E.B. I know and mildly tolerate would never do that. He hates people. He’d rather have his fingernails ripped out one at a time rather than socialize.”
“Damn it, Loretta.”
“So I’m asking one more time. I think I deserve to know—since you’re fucking up your career and ruining a hefty twenty percent that I get paid—who is the skirt?”
I can see through the door as Eb rubs the back of his neck. He’s facing her, so I can’t see his face. I don’t really need to. I’ve heard enough. I start to back away, but I really don’t do it soon enough.
“I’m still the same. I did all this to get in my neighbor’s pants.”
“Has your game slipped so much that you have to dress up like a freak in red pajamas to get your dick played with?”
“She likes Christmas. It gave me an in with her. I wasn’t thinking past that, figured it didn’t matter, because I’d be done with her by the time Christmas rolled around.”
That wasn’t just a knife wound.
That was a fatal blow.
It hurts so deeply that my breath burns in my chest. My skin instantly breaks out in a cold sweat and I stagger under the weight of the pain. I can’t even stop a moan of pain from coming to my lips.
That’s the one thing I wish I could take back, because the sound causes Eb to turn and face me.
“Joy,” he says, his voice soft. He takes a step toward me and I take a step back. “Joy, honey,” he says and the endearment just twists the knife in my heart. It also wakes me up. I spin around and run away. I hear Eb calling my name, but that just makes me run harder. I don’t want to talk to him. I don’t want to see him.
I never want to see him again.
Chapter 22
Eb
“Fuck!”
“Let me guess. Comfort still isn’t taking your calls.”
“Her name is Joy and no she’s not. Not that, that is any of your business. Why are you still here, Loretta?”
“Morbid curiosity mostly. That and you still haven’t given me your completed manuscript.”
“The manuscript can go to hell. I’ve got other things on my mind.”
“I can see that. When’s the last time you showered?”
“Why in the hell won’t she take my calls? We’re both fucking adults. Is it so much to ask that she talk about this sensibly?” I growl out, slamming my fist on my desk. That hurts like hell, but I welcome the pain. It gives me something to focus on besides the fact that it’s been over a week now since I’ve spoken to Joy.
I’ve tried everything.
She’s not been in her bakery. Her assistant Tina would barely speak to me too, but she said enough to let me know Joy is out of town.
Of course I knew that, because I’ve tried to find her at her house too. She’s not been home. She never came home after the party, not even to pack clothes.
“I’m not good at matters of the heart, but I’m going to venture to say if I ever gave a damn about a man and I heard him say he was only using me to fuck me, I’d never want to see him again too.”
I don’t respond verbally to Loretta, though I do make a noise that I hope tells her to shut the fuck up.
Apparently it doesn’t.
“But, I’d never have that problem because I’m sane. The opposite sex only has one use in my life. It’s a philosophy I thought we shared.”
“We did until Joy. If she had just stayed around,” I mutter, staring at the phone and wishing she would call me.
“To hear you say worse things? I think she should be glad she left when she did.”
“That’s just it! It wasn’t worse. I was trying to explain that even though that’s how it started…it’s different now.”
“Different?”
“Yeah. Joy’s different. Shit there were nights we didn’t do anything other than sleep.”
“You don’t sleep.”
“I did with Joy,” I grumble and I did. “When she was next to me, I was finally able to sleep. I wanted to sleep. I wanted nothing more than to close my eyes with her warm body wrapped around me and listen to her breathe. I wanted to make her laugh and listen to that sound for… Shit. A lot longer than I got the chance. Christ. She needs to know that she wasn’t just a body to use until I grew bored. Not anymore and if I’m truly honest with myself she wasn’t to begin with. Joy was different from the beginning. Joy was… is… everything.”
“Shit,” Loretta says and I look up at her. Her face is full of shock. “Do you love her?”
Her words sound foreign to me, but I let them settle inside of me and they feel right.