Josh watched her for a moment and then let out a breath and dragged a hand through his dark hair. ‘I didn’t think. To be honest, kids aren’t really my thing.’ His voice was gruff and he shook his head. ‘He came over here, he was interested in the boat, I showed him. It was nothing more complicated than that. It didn’t occur to me you’d be worried. I don’t know much about being a parent.’
She felt the anger drain out of her.
Of course he didn’t. He was the archetypal single guy.
Sexy, single guy.
You could tell at a glance that the only thing Josh Sullivan would know about children was how to avoid having them. She gave a cynical smile. Men were all the same. It wasn’t his fault.
It was her fault. She was a lousy mother. She should have woken up. She was the one who was supposed to be looking after him and she’d failed dismally.
Suddenly her legs felt weak with reaction. She plopped onto the bench and sucked in a long breath. ‘Archie, you have to promise me you won’t do anything like this again.’
‘I can’t come and see the boat again?’ His face fell and his bottom lip started to shake. ‘But Josh taught me the knot.’
She saw the he
ro-worship in his sweet little face and felt her stomach drop. He’d been in Josh’s company for less than an hour and already he was looking at him as though he were nothing short of a god. Was this her fault? she wondered. Was it because Archie had no male role model?
Why, oh, why did life have to be so complicated?
She’d thought that leaving London would be the best thing for both of them but now she wasn’t so sure.
‘Sweetheart.’ She kept her voice patient, trying to appeal to his sense of reason. ‘It was kind of Josh to show you the boat and help you with your knots, but that’s it now. We need to go home and have some breakfast.’
‘But can we come back after?’
‘No, we can’t!’ She was absolutely sure that the last thing Josh needed to enhance his weekend was a lively six-year-old boy. ‘I have lots of nice things planned. Now, say thank you to Josh.’
Archie stared at the ground mutinously and Kat nudged him gently. ‘Archie…’
‘Thank you,’ he mumbled, and then lifted his head and looked at her pleadingly. ‘But can we come back again if you come too and if I ask nicely and remember to say thank you?’ His tone was desperate. ‘Please?’
Kat swallowed, embarrassed and flustered. She ached to give her son everything he wanted but it just wasn’t possible. ‘No, sweetheart,’ she said huskily, brushing her hair out of her eyes and trying to keep her voice firm. ‘Josh has a life to lead.’
And it didn’t include single mothers and small boys.
Josh shifted. ‘Well, I—’ He broke off, his eyes on the boy, as if he wanted to say something and couldn’t quite bring himself to. He shrugged awkwardly. ‘Be good.’
Kat gritted her teeth and then gave herself a telling-off. What had she expected? That he’d invite her son to spend the day with him? She must be losing her mind.
Bursting into tears, Archie tugged himself out of his mother’s arms and ran the short distance to their cottage without looking back.
Kat breathed out heavily. ‘Oh, damn…’
Six-year-olds didn’t have much in the way of reason, she reminded herself wearily. And Archie was such a willing, compliant child usually. But his love of boats seemed to override everything. She stood up quickly, her eyes on Archie, watching until he vanished into the kitchen.
Josh stared after him. ‘So that’s Archie. I have to admit he wasn’t quite what I expected.’
She turned to look at him, her mind elsewhere. ‘What?’
‘Yesterday you said you were with Archie.’ His tone was cool as he reminded her of their previous conversation. ‘Naturally I assumed that Archie was well over the age of consent. Obviously you’re a single parent. Why did you feel the need to lie?’
She froze. Why did her life have to be so complicated? ‘I didn’t lie.’
‘You said he was studying,’ Josh reminded her dryly. ‘What exactly is he studying? Architecture with play dough? Just for the record, I understand the word “no”, Kat. You don’t have to use a child to keep me at a distance.’
She doubted he’d ever heard the word ‘no’ in his life, at least not from a woman. ‘I really don’t want to talk about this now.’