appeared to be trying to figure out how to say what he needed to say.
But I was afraid I already knew what he was going to say, and if I was wrong, I would be incredibly relieved, so either way I wasn't in the mood to be patient.
"Just say it," I snapped.
He looked up at me with sad eyes, but I refused to budge. He hadn't even spoken yet, and I already felt the icy walls creeping back up around my heart, pushing out all the happiness and warmth I had been experiencing. My heart was still thudding in my chest, and there was still a small part of my brain that was hoping he was going to say something I wasn't expecting to hear, something better.
But when his mouth opened, the words I already knew were going to come out were finally released:
"Kayla's pregnant."
Chapter Eleven-
I had expected to hear it, and yet I wasn't prepared for the feeling that I had been punched in the stomach.
Somehow I did remain standing, and I finally nodded, not able to speak.
“Wow,” I finally muttered.
"I'm so sorry, Nikki," he began. "I promise you I did not mean—"
"Your promises don't mean shit, Derek," I said coldly, not letting him finish.
He tried to take my hand, but I jerked it away from him, not wanting him to touch me, afraid that if he did, I might start crying.
My heart was still skipping strangely, and I swallowed, trying to make the weird feeling go away.
"Nikki, I don't know how this happened," he said.
I smiled, but it lacked sincerity and humor. "Funny, I do."
"I didn't care about her. I don't care about her," he amended.
I nodded, not knowing what to say. That really didn't matter anymore, did it?
"Please say something, Nikki," he pleaded, trying to take my hand again.
I pulled my hand away once more, not willing to be touched until I got the most important answer. "Are you—" I stopped, clearing my throat, trying to make the lump I felt go out of my voice. "Are you seeing her again?"
He paused long enough to give me my answer, then he quietly said, "I don't... know what's going on right now."
I smiled coldly, literally feeling like there was ice running through my veins. "Wow," I said simply, not even able to put my feelings into words.
"I'm so sorry, Nikki. I never meant for this to happen. I didn't even... Kayla and I... we didn't even..."
"Fuck?" I said, offering the word he didn't seem to be able to get out. "For some reason I don't believe that."
"Not often," he said.
"It only takes once, Derek," I said, feeling so angry that I ached to hit him.
"Well, that's about all it happened. As soon as—"
"I don't want to hear about it," I said irritably. "How far along is she?"
"I don't know," he said. "We didn't... it couldn't have been before that football game we all went to together."
My heart fell again, and I asked myself why he had to give me an exact timeframe to imagine when he was screwing Kayla.