Just like my mom, I was a curvy girl too. But Mom had taught me to love myself, every curve of my body, no matter what anyone else said. And I’d followed her advice since I was a little girl. I just hoped Bastian wouldn’t mind. Some guys had a very obvious preference.
I got dressed for dinner, taking special care with my hair. I brushed it into a silky chocolate brown wave, adding gloss to my lips and some mascara to my long lashes. My thoughts were still spinning around one man and one man only. Bastian.
He was so charming, so sweet. He’d brought me special presents when I was a little girl. He’d taken me out on weekends to see foreign movies and visit art galleries. And since Mom had gone, he’d taken special care to make me feel like I still had a family.
Mom had always loved Bastian. And something told me she would have been on our side no matter what. If we were in love, Mom would want us to be together.
I wasn’t so sure if Daddy would think the same.
“Holly, would you pass the gravy?”
“Yes, Daddy.” I handed him the gravy boat, glancing at Bastian before going back to my dinner.
“You’re awfully quiet tonight, honey.” Dad narrowed his eyes at me. “Everything okay?”
“Yes,” I muttered, avoiding his eyes. “Bastian, would you like some mashed potatoes?”
“Uh, sure.” He wouldn’t look at me, even when I handed him the bowl. “Thank you again for letting me stay the night, Aston.”
“No problem. I thought you could do with a little holiday hospitality. You’ve been working yourself ragged.”
All kinds of thoughts erupted in my mind, but they all revolved around Bastian working himself ragged. I’d do anything to watch him. I imagined his fingers wrapped around my panties after he found them under his pillow, jerking off his cock with fast, desperate motions, the lace sticking to him after he came.
I cleared my throat, busying myself with my plate while Dad and Bastian talked. Dinner took forever, and I finally excused myself twenty minutes later, leaving them to their nightly whiskey.
It wasn’t until later, after I was leaving the bathroom, that I saw him again.
I was wearing my white fluffy robe, my face bare and my hair pinned up, when Bastian called out my name. Turning around, I came face-to-face with the man I’d loved forever.
“Yes?”
“About what happened before…” He looked down the hallway before approaching me. His hand lingered but never stopped on mine. Bastian pulled it back instead. “I don’t think your father noticed anything.”
“Good,” I muttered. “Just what you wanted, isn’t it?”
“Holly, please. You know I…”
“You what?” I asked after a moment’s silence. “Tell me, Bastian.”
He heaved a heavy sigh, and I could feel the burden I’d left on his shoulders, making him look more ruggedly handsome than ever. “You know I can’t do it. I could never do this to your dad, Holly.”
“Not even if…” I swallowed my next words. “Not even if I promised to make it worth it?”
He stared me down, his voice raspy as the next words slid from his lips. “How would you make it worth it, sugar plum?”
My heart raced as I took a step closer, fingers lingering on the belt of my dressing gown. I undid the bow at my hip, taking the sides of the robe in my hands and gently pulling them apart. Bastian’s eyes grew troubled, slowly moving from my face down my entire body, as if he were trying to commit the sight to memory.
“Cover yourself up, Holly,” he groaned.
I closed the robe again, tying the bow again. Leaning in close, I allowed my breath to tickle Bastian’s ear, my heart pounding with the braveness I hadn’t known I possessed.
“I’ll be in my bedroom,” I whispered. “Right down the hall from yours. And I’ll be waiting, Bastian.”
His guilt-stricken look burned my back as I turned around and walked away from him.
Four
Bastian
I didn’t know what I’d been thinking by going to her room and telling her that I was staying the night. She probably wouldn’t have even realized. I would’ve left before she even got up tomorrow morning. But a part of me wanted to see what her reaction would be.
I’d felt her gaze on me the entire time at dinner, and when I looked at her, I’d seen her physical reaction, the way her body stiffened, her pupils dilating. I wanted so desperately to believe that she wanted me as well, but it might just be my wishful thinking, my hopefulness that she could be mine, that had me thinking these things.
But I hadn’t been wrong. Because when she shut that door and told me what she wanted, that she wanted me to take her out, for her to be mine, I swore the fucking world stopped.