To her surprise he cleared the table while she got out the container of Rocky Road. They took their bowls to the sofa, and Rick patted the seat beside him. “Come here and snuggle up.”
She curled up next to him, tucking her legs to the side as they took spoonfuls of the cold treat.
After a few minutes Rick spoke. “Can I ask you something, Jess?”
“Of course.” His voice was low and serious and she bit down on her lip. This was all so new, so fragile. She didn’t want to do or say anything to break the delicate balance they’d achieved today.
He knit his fingers together pensively. “I’ve been doing some thinking about what you said about there not being a timeline for dealing with my mom’s stuff.”
She was a bit surprised by his choice of topic, but that quickly passed as a warmth spread over her. If she were honest with herself, she’d been a little afraid that sex between them would just be … well, sex. But Rick really did trust her. Of course he’d still be dealing with his grief and she was pleased he wanted to talk about it.
“It takes a while,” she encouraged, giving him a squeeze. “It’s not like making a list and checking things off. Sometimes you think you’re doing great and then wham! A memory will hit you and take you back when you least expect it.”
He nodded. “I know what you mean.” His gaze looked far away for a few moments before dropping to meet hers. “I’ve been putting something off, but maybe it’s time I took a step forward.”
Intrigued, she sat up a little. “Oh?”
“Ian Martin handled Mom’s estate. There was a safe deposit box key, but I haven’t gone to the bank yet. It’s the last thing I have to deal with, and…”
His voice trailed off and she thought she might understand what he was getting at. “And once you have, you’re afraid you’ll let go? And you don’t want to do that yet. Because once you do, it’s really final.”
He nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t know how to explain it, but that’s it.”
Her eyes misted over a bit, knowing he was hurting. “I think it’s probably common. When my dad died, there were so many loose ends. And then one day I found my mom, sitting in the back garden, crying.” She looked into Rick’s solemn face. “When I asked her what was wrong, she said everything was settled, and it had finally hit her that he was really gone.”
His arms tightened around her and they both held on, thinking their own thoughts for a few minutes.
“Do you know what’s in the box?”
Another shake. “Not a clue. But all the legal documents were with the lawyer. I can’t imagine what she’d want to put in a safety deposit box. It’s not like we ever had money or anything expensive. It’s a bit of a mystery, really.”
He reached out and took her hand. “I should have a look inside. It’s probably nothing important anyway. Knowing Mom, it’ll probably be filled with my crayon drawings and baby teeth.” He smiled fondly. “Maybe you could go with me?”
Jess leaned her head back against him shoulder, absently fiddling with his fingers, which were still twined together with hers. Being with Rick like this felt right, intimate. And while normally, she would shy away from using that word with someone so quickly, that ship had already sailed. If he didn’t want to be alone when he opened the box, she’d be there with him.
“Of course I will. You make the appointment and I’ll arrange to be there.” He was trusting her enough to ask. And today she’d seen a less complicated Rick, and the changes in him urged her to trust him, too.
“We’ll play it by ear,” he said. “And now, I should get going. Wouldn’t want to outstay my welcome.”
Jess smiled and got up from the sofa, waited as he grabbed his coat and shoes and walked him to the back door of her workroom to say good-bye. They lingered there for a moment, both of them unsure about what to do next. Smile and wave? Kiss? What sort of kiss? Quick and casual, or long and lingering? Rick finally made a move, leaning in and kissing her, not too fast but not too long either, just a slow, complete kiss that left her weak in the knees.
She watched him go, a part of her thrilled and another part of her scared to death. With Rick it wasn’t just physical. They’d known each other too long. Cared about each other too much for it not to have meaning. There was a gravity to being intimate with him that she wasn’t sure she was ready for.
Scared to death didn’t even begin to cover it. She was fully involved now, and she doubted he realized how much power she’d just placed in his hands.
He had the power to hurt her. She hadn’t allowed that to happen since Mike … but the truth was, when it came to Rick, she hadn’t had any other choice. When it came to Rick, her heart didn’t listen to logic.
* * *
Rick didn’t want to go home yet.
Being with Jess had been incredible. Better than he’d imagined. She’d been glorious.
He pulled his truck into The Rusty Fern. He was dying for a game of darts. He hadn’t been inside for weeks now, and for good reason. He’d been avoiding the bottle and doing a good job of it. But he wasn’t here for the liquor. He was here because he missed the guys, the social atmosphere. He could enjoy that, couldn’t he? And forget the rest?
It was worth a try. He felt he was ready to pass this test.
Inside the bar it smelled of frying grease, grilling beef, and yeasty beer. Rick inhaled the familiar aroma and scanned the room. Bingo. Tom and Bryce were shooting darts, two pints of beer on a nearby table. Tom shot a triple twenty that caused Bryce to curse under his breath and take a sip from one of the glasses.