If she gave him anything, would he take it all? Including her heart again?
“You want your name on the deed?” he asked, interrupting the negative turn her thoughts had taken again. What was wrong with her? She’d always been one to see the positive side of life. To take pleasure in little things.
“Probably, yes,” she said, though that thought hadn’t been forefront on her mind. Did she dare tell him she wanted him to sign away all custodial rights? What if he hadn’t even thought about taking them from her? Would she be borrowing trouble where there’d been none?
Putting ideas in his head that he didn’t want there?
“What else?”
The station was in sight. Thank God.
“You just laid this on me, Nolan. Give me some time to process,” she said, not realizing how harsh she sounded until she saw the blank look cover his face.
She’d hurt him and that was the last thing she’d meant to do.
She might wish the man hadn’t come back into her life. He might have broken her heart. But he was a good man trying to do the right thing.
And she wasn’t going to turn into a shrew just because life hadn’t gone exactly as she’d hoped.
“I’m sorry. That wasn’t... I’m just...”
She didn’t get to finish the thought. He leaned over, kissed her and was facing forward so quickly again she could hardly believe it had even happened.
Based on the statuesque way he was sitting there, as though frozen, she had a feeling his spontaneous action hadn’t been in his plan, either.
It had been only a peck.
But, oh, God, she’d felt it all the way through her.
Still in shock, she handed him the baby carrier as they got off the train, and took the bags to handle herself. He’d bought enough Christmas outfits to dress Stella for a month. And toys that would overflow her bin. She was hoping to talk him into going with her to donate some of it the next day, hoping he wouldn’t be offended.
Nolan Forte would have gladly complied.
When they got to the car, and Stella woke up before they could get her settled in her seat, Lizzie unhooked the baby and held Stella out to her father. It wasn’t time for her to eat yet. She wasn’t fussy. “You want to hold her?” she asked.
They weren’t going to talk about the kiss.
Walking around to the trunk of her car, he stopped. Stared at her, and then at Stella.
Without a word he approached, his gaze only on Stella, and then he looked up at Lizzie again, as though questioning. She smiled, not on purpose, it just came, and carefully handed the baby over, her forearm resting momentarily on his. “She’s pretty good with her neck and head now, but you still need to make sure you support it at all times.”
She laid the baby right in the crook of his arm. He didn’t move. Didn’t adjust her at all. Just stood there, staring down at her, the oddest look on his face.
She’d never known an expression could show such a wealth of emotion. She’d read about it. Seen actors do it. But this was just a guy in a parking lot. Falling in love with his baby girl.
She loaded the bags in the trunk, wanting to give him time. And then took her phone out of her purse and snapped a couple of pictures. Just so there’d be something to show Stella someday, if this was the last time they ever heard from Nolan Fortune.
He didn’t even seem to notice. The baby’s flailing fingers had landed on his lips and he was kissing them.
Lizzie jolted, turned away, pulling her keys out of her back pocket, ready to get the baby in her seat and head home. Filled with shame, with jitters she couldn’t explain, she took a couple of seconds to compose herself, hardly believing that she was jealous of her own daughter.
* * *
“You okay, man?” Daly’s comment, as the band made last-minute plug-ins, checks and adjustments Wednesday night, was softly voiced, but Branham and Glenn were both looking on from their own positions on the stage.
“Great,” Nolan said, shrugging in the way a cool guy did when he wanted to be left alone. “Couldn’t be better.”
He was fine. He dropped his plug-in, twice, and stumbled over a mic stand, sore because he’d run five miles after he’d left Lizzie and Stella that afternoon, and then skipped dinner.