t have such a good relationship. That’s probably a rare situation.”
“Oh, no!” she laughed shaking her head. “Patrick and I were never married. God, no. It was... well,” worried eyes rose to mine. “He and I kind of had this random fling. I was such an idiot, I got pregnant. It was totally my fault.”
She was so cute being embarrassed in front of me, as if I hadn’t done worse things. “You know, it takes two people to make a baby.”
“I know.” She nodded, pushing her hands into the sides of her hair. It was a gesture I’d learned meant she was flustered. “But I told him I was on the pill. I’d been sick and taking antibiotics, and... We were so drunk and stupid. I was such an idiot.”
The room went quiet, and I tried to think of something to say. Her face was hot pink, and I still couldn’t get over how she would blush. Her, in all her purple hair and bold personality. The blushing killed me.
“You probably think I’m a complete flake now.” Her voice was quiet, and I almost laughed.
“I don’t think that at all.”
“I would. I’d think I was some kind of psycho.”
Scooting forward, I scooped her onto my lap. Her legs straddled my waist, and she looked down, not meeting my eyes.
“Hey,” my voice was soft. “Look at me.” She didn’t, so I said it with a little more force. “Look. At. Me.”
Those little blue birds fluttered to meet my gaze, and fuck, if she didn’t take another little chink. “Everybody does stupid shit they regret. I’m the world champ at it.”
Her mouth pressed into a little sideways grin. “You keep saying that, but I’m still not convinced.”
The lightness in my mood disappeared. I caught her chin and made her look at me. “Trust me. I’m the champ.”
Her brow fell, and I hated that I’d been so forceful with her. Pushing back, she sat on the floor in front of me, looking at her palm. “I’ve made more stupid decisions than anyone I know.”
It was more of an opening than I’d ever expect to get, so I took it. “What’s that about?” I nudged her hand. “Why do you have that there?”
She didn’t lift her head. Her voice was a quiet monotone as she spoke. “When my husband died, I kind of lost it. Everyone hated him—my parents in particular—which is probably why I loved him all the more. He left out of here like a bat out of hell, and I chased right after him. Then he died.”
An ache moved in my chest at her words. I hated thinking of her going through that kind of pain alone. “I’m sorry. ”
“He had a best friend Max... Max’s older brother felt sorry for me, so he gave me a job.” She grinned up at me. “I worked as a tattoo artist for a little over a year.”
I smiled back. “That’s pretty cool.”
“Yeah, only I didn’t know anything about the culture or anything. What things meant.” She looked back at her palm. “I’d seen a few guys with teardrop tattoos, and I thought about how much I’d cried after my husband died. So I put a tear in my hand, like for all the tears I’d held wishing he were still alive.”
She didn’t say more, and I couldn’t think of a good response. When she looked up at me again, she seemed to read my mind, and we both exhaled a laugh. She rolled her eyes and leaned forward against my chest, her shoulders shaking with her laugh. “I’m such a dumbass.”
Wrapping my arms around her, I kissed the top of her head. “It’s actually a pretty good gag. You really had me going at the gym.”
She sat up fast then, catching my eye. “Oh my god, you thought I was a murderer?” She shook her head. “And you were still brave enough to sleep with me?”
“You’re pretty small. I’m pretty confident I could take you.”
“Don’t make me kick your ass again.” She narrowed those beautiful blue eyes at me. I caught her chin to kiss her roughly.
“You know where that leads.” A white-hot image of us so close to making it in the men’s room flitted across my brain, prompting a response below my belt.
“Hmm...” Her wicked grin only made me harder. “I remember liking where that led.”
Lifting her easily, I carried her straight to my bed. Laying her back against the pillows, I slid forward, holding my torso up with my forearms. Our mouths were only a breath apart, but I waited. I wanted to look into her blue eyes a little longer. She was so strong and she had that edge, yet at the same time, she was still innocent. God, what was I doing?
My heart wouldn’t let me think about it. It was a damn, stubborn taskmaster, and it wanted one thing—this gorgeous creature in my arms. I might be so tough and controlled outside this bed, but laying here, with her small body in my arms, her legs slipping around my waist and her fingers threading into the sides of my hair, I was powerless.
It didn’t scare me at all, which was why I should’ve known to be afraid.