The light blinked, and I read what she wrote. It was one word.
“Remember how it works?” she said. “If it hurts too much?”
I nodded, realizing now she would never have sent me away. Warmth flooded my entire body as I met her eyes.
Bubblegum.
In that one word, I was back. We were both back. Safe and exactly where we belonged.
Epilogue
Elaine
Control. Choosing my own destiny. Firmly holding the reins—these have always been the most important things in my life.
They’re why I didn’t go to law school, they’re probably why I love teaching so much. They’re definitely why I stayed with Brian too long. He’d never posed a threat to my independence. He didn’t ask me for anything. He made no demands… And we shared the most uninspiring, unromantic, passionless relationship of my life.
Eight months with one man has changed everything.
With a sigh, I lean my head on my hand to watch him sleep. Patrick Knight. I lightly touch his smoky hazel eyes, now closed. My gaze travels up to his light-brown hair tipped with natural gold highlights I beg him not to trim. (They’re so beachy!)
My chest rises with the warmth of the overwhelming, out-of-control, completely hopeless love I have for him.
Another first for me—I do not fall hopelessly in love. In all of my relationships, I’m the dominant one, the one who calls the shots, decides when it’s time to have sex, when it’s time to end it. Not with this man.
His lined stomach rises and falls gently with his breathing, and my eyes continue their journey to where the sheet is draped across his waist. A memory of that first night I tied him up flickers through my mind, and heat flares between my legs. God, that had been wild. And incredibly hot. I could still see his muscles rippling as he struggled to get free, and a little shiver runs through me.
That edge between intense love and intense power is absolutely thrilling. He took me so hard… The next day, I’d run away like a scared little girl. I knew in that moment I could never say no to him. He would take everything from me, and I’d give it to him willingly. He was stronger than me, and I loved it. And it terrified me.
Sliding down on the mattress, I press my back into his side and hold up my left hand. A square-cut diamond engagement ring, surrounded by tiny baguettes is on my third finger. A walk on the beach, sunset, I didn’t know what he was doing until I felt the cool metal sliding on my finger. Of course I said yes.
“Still like your ring?” his voice is behind my shoulder, low and in my ear, and the sound registers in my core.
“Yes.” Turning my face to kiss his nose, his lovely eyes blink slowly, and I smile. “Did you sleep well?”
Strong arms go around my waist, holding me tightly against his chest, like he’s afraid I’ll slip away. Like that could ever happen.
“Mm-hm,” he breathes, kissing the crook of my neck. Everything inside me lights up at the mixture of love and desire in his voice. I don’t have to look down to know what he wants. I can feel it.
“I was just thinking…” A sneaky smile crosses my lips, and I scoot lower in his arms so my ass is pressed into his pelvis.
His hands slide down my stomach and his mouth is right at my ear sending a shiver to my toes. “I like where your head’s at.”
Every touch has my body tingling. He kisses my shoulder, sending desire blazing through me, and I feel him hard at my back. Dropping my head against his shoulder, I open my thighs.
“My head?” I tease, but it comes out as more of a moan.
“Among other things.” His fingers ripple across my clit as he fills me from behind, groaning with each thrust, taking me higher with each push.
I can’t help a little cry. He fills me so completely, the pleasure is almost painful. I’m trembling inside, and his fingers massaging my clit have me going blind.
With an exhaled swear, he thrusts deeper, and I can’t help arching my back to him. Heat, waves of delicious energy trembling down my legs, deep groans mixed with higher sighs. We’ve been together all sorts of ways, both of us happy to experiment, but the morning rush, the level of intense desire and urgency gets me every time.
He rolls me onto my stomach, moving faster between my legs, scrubbing my clit against the mattress. My whole body rocks with his thrusts, and the friction has me hotter and more tense… the tightness in my stomach, the growing pressure is so strong, all I know is if he stops, I’ll implode.
“Oh, god, more,” I beg as he groans, going deeper, harder.
Quivers start in my thighs until at last it tips over the edge. I’m crying out, arching up from the mattress; his head touches my shoulder with a deep groan as he comes. Another pump, and I almost don’t want him to stop, another and I’m pushing back against him. One more, and I’m crying out again.