With a groan, I pushed open my car door and stumbled inside. I plugged my phone in on my bedside table and laid down while it charged. My entire body was begging for sleep, but my brain had other ideas. I couldn’t stop thinking long enough to let my eyes fall shut.
Five minutes later, my phone clicked on. Immediately, it began to buzz with all my missed notifications. I rolled over to see six missed calls from Julie and two voicemails. My stomach tightened as I pressed my phone to my ear to listen.
“Michael,” Julie said. Her voice was full of emotion, but I could tell she was trying to control herself. “I don’t know what game you’re playing, but you’re a world-class asshole for pulling this! I’ve been waiting for you for three hours! You haven’t even called or texted. At first, I was worried that something happened to you, but now I know you’re just a horrible person.”
My heart sank when I heard those words, but it wasn’t as bad as I expected. She would be fine once I explained everything. She would understand.
I kept my phone pressed to my ear while Julie’s second message began to play. From the first word she spoke, my hopes were dashed.
“Michael!” she practically screamed my name into the phone. I could feel her anger as if she were standing right beside me. “You still haven’t called me. What the fuck? After everything you’ve already put me through, you’re just going to stand me up? Is this a joke or something? Are you and Joshua sitting together at some bar, laughing at my expense? ‘Oh, that stupid Julie! She actually thought I would show up tonight! What an idiot!’”
She paused to hiccup, and I realized she’d been drinking.
“Well, I am an idiot,” she said. “I’m an idiot to believe that you ever cared about me. I thought you lied because you liked me, but you didn’t. You lied because you’re a liar and nothing more. You’re just a lying liar asshole, just like your brother, and I never want to see you again. Ever! Don’t call me. Don’t come by. Don’t even try to see me. You lost your chance. I gave you a second chance, and you fucked it up, so just stay away from me. For good.”
By the time I was done listening to her messages, I was sitting bolt upright in bed. I called her back with shaking hands. She didn’t answer. The second time I tried, she sent me to voicemail. Finally, on the third try, she picked up.
“Stop calling me,” she said. “I don’t want to talk to you.”
“Julie,” I said. “Please, just let me explain what happened.”
“There’s nothing to explain,” she snapped. “Leave me the hell alone.”
She hung up. I closed my eyes and cursed myself for not calling her sooner. How could I have been so stupid? I hurt her so badly that now, she wouldn’t even listen to my explanation.
As tired as I was, I knew I couldn’t wait. I jumped out of bed and ran to my car. I sped through town until I reached Julie’s house. My head was racing as I ran up to her front door. I knocked, hard and fast.
I could hear Julie moving around inside, and when I peered through the glass, I saw what was unmistakably her shadow. She didn’t come near the door, so I knocked again. And again. Still, nothing. I was beginning to lose hope when I realized that, if I left, that would be the end. I’d never get another chance.
I decided it didn’t matter how long I had to wait, I would stand out there for hours until Julie finally let me inside. I had to explain myself. Julie needed to know the truth – that I didn’t just stand her up for no reason.
Finally, ten minutes later, Julie finally came toward the door. She stopped on the other side with her hand on the doorknob. I could see her through the glass, her eyes glazed with tears and her lips set in an angry line.
“Please,” I said softly. “Just open the door, Julie.”
When she did, the look on her face was enough to knock me backward. I took a step away from her glare. Daggers shot out of her beautiful eyes. For the first time, I doubted whether I would be able to fix things.
“I don’t want to hear it,” Julie said before I could speak. “There is nothing you can say that will make up for last night.”
“It wasn’t my fault,” I began.
“I don’t want to hear it!” she yelled. “You stood me up, Michael! I waited for you for three hours! Three hours of just sitting around, hoping you would show up.”
“I’m sorry, I—”
“Your apologies don’t mean anything,” Julie said. Her anger was still written all over her face, but buried deep down was something else. Something worse. She was heartbroken, and it was all my fault.
“I never meant to—”
“It doesn’t matter!” she yelled. “Just get out of here. I don’t ever want to see you again.”
“You don’t mean that,” I said. “When I tell you what—”
“You don’t get to tell me anything anymore,” Julie said. “I’ve heard enough from you. You lied to me. You let me fall for you. You slept with me! All while keeping a huge secret from me!”
“That was—”
“And I forgave you!” Julie snapped. “For all of that, I forgave you. I wanted us to make things work. I was so excited to see you, to celebrate Christmas with you. I couldn’t wait to be with you again. I spent all those days missing you and being miserable. And for what? Just so I could be stood up and made a fool of?”