“I’m done blaming everyone else for the stupid shit I did, Logan.” His voice was low. “I can’t do that anymore. If I did, I wouldn’t be half the man that I want to be. The kind of man I need to be. I fucked up my life and I did it on my own.”
Logan crossed his arms over his chest, but didn’t say a word.
“Bobbi might have sent me over the edge but I was standing there already. I wanted to fall. I wanted to fail.” He turned back to his oldest friend. “Sure the girl tore out my heart but what did I do? I turned around and fucked one of her best friends.”
“Technically you and Bobbi were split up.” Logan offered.
“That doesn’t excuse what I did, because I did it to get back at her. I did it because I wanted to hurt her and you know what? That was something I didn’t fail at.” Pain rifled through Shane and he glanced away, ashamed. The look in Bobbi’s eyes when she had burst into his room…when she had found him on the bed they used to make love in, bent over a naked, writhing, Jane Lawson was one he would never forget.
Technically he hadn’t screwed Jane. Hell, after Bobbi had slammed the door shut and left him, he would have needed a truckload of Viagra to get the job done. But still the intent had been there and he sure as fuck hadn’t done anything to let Bobbi know the truth. In fact, that last night, the night his life had truly gone to hell, he’d thrown it in her face.
Truth be told, it was that moment that had sent him over the cliff and it had nothing to do with Bobbi hurting him. It had everything to do with the fact that he hated himself for causing her pain. For losing her.
For not fighting for what he wanted. He was done with that. He was ready to grab what was his.
“Okay,” Logan said finally. “Okay, but that still doesn’t tell me what exactly it is you’re up to.”
“I want her back.”
“Back as in…”
“I don’t want a fuck buddy if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“What do you want?”
For a moment Shane didn’t say anything. Maybe it was because it wasn’t until that exact moment that he really knew what the answer was. Or maybe it was because he savored the dramatic flavor of what he was going to say. Either way, he took his time. He rolled his shoulders, exhaled softly and then looked at Shane.
“I want everything.”
Logan stared at him long and hard and then he nodded, his body relaxing a little as he leaned against the countertop. “How exactly are you planning on doing that? Bobbi isn’t exactly the type to be manipulated or tricked and I’m still not convinced she will ever think you’re right for her.” He shrugged. “She’s changed a lot. Hell, she was engaged and about to marry Gerald fucking Dooley.”
“But she didn’t.”
“So what’s your plan?” Logan still sounded unsure and more than a little concerned.
“Don’t sweat it Forest. There might not be a two of us together. The ball’s in Bobbi’s court and I have no idea if she’s going to take the bait.”
“Bait?”
Shane smiled and shoved his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “Sex.”
“You’re using sex as bait for Bobbi Jo Barker.”
“Underhanded, I know but I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I’m going to reel her in with the promise of hot nights and more orgasms than she can handle and when she’s weak I’ll move in for the kill. I’ll make her see the truth.”
“Oh yeah, and what’s that?”
“That no matter what she or half of New Waterford thinks, we belong together. I might not deserve a second chance with her but I’m going to take it.”
A knock at the door sounded and Logan frowned.
“Expecting anyone?”
“Nope.” Logan headed for the front door. “Hold on.”
“Nah, I gotta get going. I’m planning on a trip out to White Hall.”
They were now at the front door and Logan paused, his hand on the doorknob. “That’s good.”