Melissa stared past me, her eyes glowing with the reflection of the red hot coals. “Hmm.”
“Hey,” I took her chin between my thumb and fingers and brought her eyes up to mine. “What’s wrong? What’s really bugging you? You’ve been a little out of it for a while now and you won’t tell me why. If I’m keeping you in the loop, then I’d ask that you do the same.”
“There’s nothing to tell. I’m just trying to keep it all together for my sake, Jackson’s sake, your sake, too. But I’m getting a little stir crazy here. I’d almost rather we get back on the boat just to have something new to see or explore.”
I considered her; not sure I believed her story. When we’d arrived at the cottage, she’d fallen in love at first sight with the place. Now she wanted to leave? “Are you sure that’s all that’s got you down? You’re bored?”
She shrugged. “Aren’t you?”
I stared at her another moment but she dropped her eyes to the grill again and before I could poke further, Jackson came out the back door wearing a pair of his pajama pants and no t-shirt. “Did you gut the fishies!”
I laughed at his excitement over the question. “Yeah, sorry, bud. I got it all ready. You can help me grill them though. How about that?”
Jackson nodded and crossed the deck to stand by my side. “I’m your first mate!”
“That’s right, although, right now it’s more like a sous chef.”
“What does that mean?” Jackson asked, wrinkling his little brow.
I chuckled. “My second in command in the kitchen.”
“Okay! I’m your sous chef,” he said, pronouncing it like Dr. Seuss.
By the time I glanced back at where Melissa was standing, she was already gone. I could see her silhouette moving on the other side of the thin curtain that hung over the back doors. She was probably getting the plantains ready. I ached to go to her and wrap her in my arms and comfort her, but I knew right now, it wasn’t an option.
After dinner, Melissa took Jackson into the bathroom to get him ready for bed. Once I’d cleared the dishes, I wandered over to the couch and sat down on the well-worn cushions. The TV had rabbit ears and barely managed to pull in three channels. All of them in Spanish. I knew enough Spanish to keep me from getting totally lost but it certainly wasn’t the same as life in the United States.
At my place, I had a giant TV that covered the majority of the living room wall. I had a channel list a mile long and at any given moment, I could pull up hundreds of options. I wasn’t much for TV but when I didn’t have the options, I suddenly missed them.
After rotating through the channels a few times, I clicked the TV off, and tossed the remote down beside me. The sudden silence was almost unnerving. I dropped my head back against the couch and closed my eyes.
“That can’t be comfortable.”
My eyes fluttered open at the sound of Melissa’s voice and the dry feeling in my mouth told me that I must have fallen asleep for some time. The crick in my neck reinforced the notion. “How long was I out?” I asked, glancing at Melissa.
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I just got Jackson to bed, so maybe half an hour?”
“Jeeze.” I rubbed the back of my neck.
“Here,” Melissa said, coming closer to me. “Turn that way.”
I did as she asked and she climbed on to the couch and balanced on her knees behind me and went to work, digging her fingers and knuckles into the kinked knots in my shoulders and neck. I groaned with deep, guttural relief at the tension releasing with each move of her hands.
Melissa laughed softly. “You’re a mess back here. It’s amazing you’re not all hunched over.”
I chuckled. “Well, as nice as this place is, the beds leave a lot to be desired.”
“Agreed,” she said with another laugh. “I don’t miss the rocking, but the boat did have nicer beds.”
“True.” I chuckled. “Of course, I’ve been missing having company in mine the last few days,” I said, venturing into dangerous territory.
Melissa fell silent and the pace of her massage slowed.
I turned around to face her and captured her hand in mine. “I don’t mean anything by that other than that I miss you. I miss…us.”
She nodded but kept her eyes trained on our interlocked hands. “I know. I do too.”
I wrinkled my brow. “Where did I lose you?”
She darted her eyes up to mine and shook her head. “You didn’t lose me, Chase. I’ve just been…distracted. I guess.”
I brushed my fingers down her cheek. “All right. I get that. There’s a lot going on right now. It’s just hard not to feel like I fucked up at some point. I talk to Jackson more than you these days. Of course, that could be because he goes at a hundred miles an hour,” I said, smiling at her.