Then said, “I—”
24
“You don’t have to say anything,” Damen quickly told her, cutting her off. Before she uttered another word. Before she even drew in another breath. “All you have to do is understand, accept… No, not even accept what I’ve just told you. Just…try to understand it.”
He stepped away from her and began to pace. Then he pulled up short and abruptly turned to face her.
“I’m not intentionally trying to make things more difficult for you, to complicate matters further,” he told her, earnestly. “But you deserve honesty, Nikki. You deserve for me to be forthcoming and transparent with you. Unfortunately, that does lead to things being more difficult, more complicated.”
“I don’t think you’re trying to deceive me, Damen,” she delicately, tentatively replied, clearly assessing this new development. “You’ve protected me. Put your own life in danger for me.”
“And I would do it again and again, Nikki,” he vehemently avowed.
“I know you’re not trying to hurt me,” she genuinely expressed. “And I can’t, in good conscious, allow myself to believe that you purposefully put my memories of my dead husband at risk. That you would compromise something that means so much to me…unless you absolutely had to.”
“I—”
She held up a hand to stop him. Took a sip of her cocktail. Then said, “You’re not a petty man. Or a shallow or vindictive one. You have some strong feelings for me.”
His brow jumped, because…that was putting it mildly.
“Some of those feelings are related to the scenario we’ve found ourselves in, the jeopardy we’ve been in—are still in.”
Now, he set aside his glass and folded his arms over his chest and smirked at her.
“I’m not demeaning or belittling your emotions, Damen,” she rightfully asserted. “I’m carefully assessing them.” She took a bigger drink from her own tumbler.
He could use a good swig himself. But he remained rooted where he stood.
Though, he did say, “I made a declaration you want to psychoanalyze. I comprehend that’s in your nature.”
“Fully,” she concurred.
“So I accept your reticence to embrace what I’ve said, while still knowing you aren’t shying away from it.”
She was still standing here, after all. And the glint of light rimming the challenge in her emerald eyes told him there was a part of Dr. Nikki Kane that wanted to confess she had strong feelings for him as well.
Hell, she’d already begun traveling that path, back at the hotel room in New York.
He’d prefer to have the opportunity with her to bide his time. Let this all play out in a comfortable, natural progression. But there was a sense of urgency around the periphery that made him anxious.
He didn’t know how much more concentrated, isolated time he’d get with her. And attempting
to sort through all the emotional minutia was a complexity unto itself.
Especially when they were both under duress. And nothing had been resolved yet with his case or her computer…or her safety.
“Listen,” he reasoned. “All I care about at the moment is that you know I’m not being duplicitous with you. That what’s happened between us—what continues to happen between us—isn’t a part of any strategy or operational tactic. It’s sincere.” He pinned her with an unwavering look.
“I’m not discounting anything,” she told him. “And I’m certainly not questioning or minimizing your efforts—in any vein.”
She paused.
He neither spoke, nor rushed her in any way. This was all very sensitive. He grasped that. Was just as mired in the criticality of it as she was.
Nikki polished off her drink and returned the glass to the wet bar. Then she faced him again.
“I don’t want you to feel as though I’m not grateful for everything you’ve done for me.”