Then of course it hadn’t been. She’d had his kid, and she loved Reese more than anything else in the world.
“I can’t afford to live on nothing, Ivan. I need you to back off so I can live my life.”
“Leave us,” Ivan said.
“Sir?”
“I said leave us.”
His goons left the room, and it made her even more scared. Her heart was racing, and she was staring at the man who featured in all of her nightmares.
“You know, you’re a really beautiful woman,” Ivan said, stepping away from his chair and moving around to stand in front of his desk.
She was frozen into place. With his men in the room she had been safe, and now she wasn’t. “I just want to earn a living. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t important.”
Ivan stared at her, and she felt his assessment as it sickened her.
“I have told you many times, Mia, you do not have to work.”
“I can’t live on noth—”
“Come here.”
Her stomach turned. Do it for Reese. Do it for Reese. Do it for Reese.
Every step she took shattered her world.
“Please stop! You’re hurting me. I don’t want this. Please!”
In the back of her mind she remembered the shout, the pain, and yet she stepped a little closer to Ivan.
When she had stepped as close to him as she could without him just grabbing her, she stared and waited.
“Why do you have to be so stubborn?”
This was what hurt so much. He didn’t have a clue that what he’d done was wrong. All he saw was that she was being difficult.
Staring at the man who tormented her life, it was difficult not to vomit, but she held it all in. She had to. Reese was over six months old now, and she was struggling to make ends meet. The apartment she lived in was past due on the rent. She needed diapers, and with the stress of everything she hadn’t been able to produce any milk so now she needed formula. She was an epic failure, just like her mother promised she would be, and it hurt, every single time. Every time Reese cried, she had failed. There was nothing she could do that was right.
Ivan had power in the streets where she lived. He was in charge, in control. No one helped her for fear of what Ivan would do. There were times he would visit her, holding Reese, and she knew there was a threat with the way he held him. At any time, he could take her son, and leave. She would have nothing, and even though the actions that created Reese were the most brutal a woman could ever go through, he was the only thing that was good. She couldn’t lose him.
“Look at you.” Ivan stood, and then his arms were wrapped around her. She closed her eyes, hating his touch, hating this man with all of her being. He had terrorized the neighborhood, poisoned it with his drugs and the women he made whore themselves out on the street. She should be thankful that he didn’t want to do the same to her, which was strange. Most of the women he was with ended up on the streets earning their keep.
She didn’t know why he kept on insisting on this between them.
“All you have to is ask me, Mia, and everything will be yours.”
“I just want to work. I want to work for myself and for Reese, please.”
Ivan touched her cheek, and she tensed up, hating his touch, but knowing she had to do it.
“Damn, every time we’re apart I forget just how beautiful you really are.” His fingers sank into her hair as his lips were close to hers. She tensed up, not knowing what she should do. She didn’t want this, but what could she do? There was no way her son could starve or live this life out of her own hatred.
The last thing she wanted was for Reese to grow up to hate her.
Just as Ivan’s lips were about to brush hers, the door opened, and she immediately pulled away from him, bowing her head.
“Sir, we’ve got a problem.”